Poet, Do I know it?

3

I am waiting, 

For a message that may never come

My phone is silent, and my heart is numb

I sit in silence, to scared to make the first move, 

what if they dont want to talk to me? what if they disapprove?

The last time I tried it only made things worse

This feels like a never ending curse 

I suppose I could try again, but I fear rejection

I'm not the only girl afraid of perfection

because that is how I see you, my dear

you're living life and making your thoughts clear

its like you have the world in the palm of your hands

and not afraid to make the commands

that is how you and I differ you see, 

It's like im walking around, feeling total misery 

You dont understand what its like to be me,

Sad, and not happy, 

trying and never quite reaching where I want to be

There are more people, who want the same thing

Who are brighter, better and the true king,

It will never be me, im just a fast burning light

I may never be enough, to lead a bright life

People around me always say

"Smile, be happy, you will see one day,

It will get better, dont give up"

But is this life of waiting enough?

How long is it before my time comes?

I could have an hour, a day or even a minute,

Seconds pass and time becomes crucial 

Is it really worth all the pain, fear and worry?

It's all so confusing,  it's all so unusual 

Here I am waiting for the one last time

Will you message me or will my heart die?