𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐋 - 𝐁.𝐄

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘 𝐓𝐖𝐎

billie's pov

...

it's been about three weeks since that day with kiara's ex in new york. i haven't touched her, flirted with her, anything ever since. but i can tell how much that's killing her.

i kinda just... stopped without any reasoning or words. kinda shitty. so i decided ima talk to her about it.

right now, kaia's at a photoshoot. usually me and kiara would go being that i'm the girlfriend and shes the manager.

but kaia told us they said there was too much happening and too much of a risk that we would distract kaia. (we totally would.)

we're on break from tour so we're in LA, back in kaia's apartment. we spent the first night in my apartment and obviously kiara went to hers down the street.

let's just say.. apparently being home makes kaia freakier than ever.

as of right now, kiara's supposed to be coming over any minute. she hasn't come over at all in the last four days we've been in LA. kinda odd.

when i hear a knock on the door, i hop up from the couch, looking through the peephole. i see kiara standing there, she doesn't look good.

she looks drained, sick even. as if she hasn't eaten or even showered in days.

i open the door.

"hey.. you okay?" i ask and she silently nods, walking in.

i fiddle with my rings, standing in the kitchen.

"we need to talk." we both speak out at the same time.

"oh- uh- you go first.." she stutters, her voice brittle and broken.

"i don't.. think.. that what we have going on is ideal. i'm dating your best friend. and i love her. we spoke about me being loyal. funny enough, the day that this started.. i'm gonna be loyal to the girl i love. she doesn't deserve this and i just keep fucking up. so, i'm sorry, i hope i'm not hurting you or anything.. i hope you didn't catch feelings or anything. if you did and if you're hurt i'm genuinely sorry.. i didn't mean for this to happen." i say. i sound so dumb right now but no matter how i do it, this has to end.

"oh.. yeah that's definitely what i was gonna say." she says in a hurt tone, picking at her nails. she literally means the complete opposite right now.

"hey, stop that." i say grabbing her hand from picking.

"gonna hurt yourself." i add on and she rolls her eyes.

"ki, i'm sorry. i never meant for this to happen. but you and i both know it could've never escalated." i tilt my head at her and she nods.

"you're right.. i know. i don't know why i did it to myself. this is dumb." she starts to tear up, her lip quivering.

"hey, hey.." i say, grabbing her face.

"you're not dumb. i was an asshole. i led you on, knowing i could never go any further. don't blame yourself." i say, caressing her face.

"she's my best friend.. i'm a shitty person.." she sobs and i pull her in, letting her cry in my arms.

"you're not a bad person.. as her girlfriend, the one that should be worried about it, i allowed this when i should not have. its never your fault. i'm an idiot." i comfort her and her breathing slows.

"calm down mama- i- ki.." i say, tripping up at the pet name. i usually call everyone pet names when comforting them but uhh... maybe not in this situation.

"i'm sorry, bil.." she whimpers, her voice breaking. she mumbles something under her breath.. something about a guy? i don't know what that's about.

"you're okay.." i say softly, caressing her hair carefully allowing me to feel all the knots and tangles.

is she this bad because of me? or because of whatever she's mumbling about.

she calms down and pulls away.

"i look a mess, i'm so sorry." she sniffles, wiping her eyes.

"you're okay.. you look tired. you need rest." i say, now genuinely concerned.

i always worried that i'd fall for kiara and end up in a weird predicament. but i'm looking her dead in the eyes right now while she's hurt over me and the only thing i feel is guilt from cheating on my girlfriend.

the girl i love.

this right here tells me i don't need to worry anymore. i don't feel anything for this girl. it was just a lust rush. small crush.

"gonna take a nap and wait for kai." she says lowly before walking to the couch, curling up in the corner under the throw blanket we keep there.

i nod and head back to my room, plopping down on the bed.

i stare at the ceiling, taking everything in.

i really need to apologize to kaia. make shit up to her. i cheated with three different people at this point.. i've had my fun or whatever you'd call that. i gotta take my baby seriously.

her birthday's coming up, so is mine. i want everything to be happy. i wanna be happy with the girl i love most.

i feel my phone vibrating. i pick it up and see it's kaia facetiming me, causing me to answer faster than i could ever imagine.

"baby!!" i beam, my dimples showing and cheeks flushing lightly. "hello my love." she smiles and i feel butterflies erupt in my stomach.

i really am in love.. my god.

"how was the shoot?" i ask, seeing she's in her car.

"it was alright! i'm tired as a bitch, drained as fuck and i miss you a lotttttt but the shoot itself  was okay." she rants about her day. i love hearing her talk.

"i'm glad to hear, mama." i say and she nods.

"what you wanna eat? any word from kiara?" she asks.

"uhh, me personally, i want taco bell. also, kiara is taking a nap on the couch waiting for you." i say and she furrows her eyebrows.

"ki is not a nap person.. is she okay?" she asks, concerned.

"i'm not sure honestly.. she looks like she's sick or maybe depressed? i don't know. she came in and just sobbed in my arms then went to sleep." i say and i see kaia's face fill with genuine concern.

now that i think about it.. she's been messed up since that day in texas. she was saying things about a guy under her breath.. i really hope she's not fucking with that guy again. kaia would kill her.

"that's weird.. i'll talk to her.." she says.

"i'm pulling up to taco bell now by the way.. three bean burritos or how many?" she asks and i nod. "three is good. thank you, baby. drive home safe, i love you and i'll see you soon." i say.

"alright, pretty girl. i'll see you in a bit. i love you more." she dismisses me before hanging up the phone.

just the thought of her voice, face was enough to send me into a blushing frenzy. she's so perfect. i have my shit set straight now. i'm so ready to take her seriously.

...

kind of a filler but also a little bit of clarity?? i just wanna know whether kiara is broken over billie or her ex, jai tbh... idk ig we'll have to see in twenty-three.

things are gonna start to look up a little.. the weather's getting colder, birthdays and holidays are nearing.. its gonna get real gay up in this bitch. but don't get too comfortable.. not a good book if it doesn't catch you off guard at least once, no?