Mona's Moments

1 - Gone Forever

They're leaving.

Now I can tell. By the big bags they're carrying. They're planning on leaving.

But why? We were good daughters. Don't they love us? I know that I wasn't really close to them, or hung out with them often. But still.

I just stood there staring while my sister, Adiva, argued with my mama. Tears were pouring. And my baba? He just stood there with an angry, impatient look.

"You're 18 now, you can care for yourself." said mama.

"I just graduated! I barely have any money, I need you NOW more then ever!" yelled Adiva.

"You'll figure it out! Just trust Allah!"

"I do trust Allah mama, but I doubt a giant pile of money will appear right in front of me!"

"Why should we care about your financial situation anyways?!" intruded baba.

"Because you're my parents! It's your job!!! If you won't think about me then what about Mona?! She's only eight!"

Baba glanced at me. He glanced at me with no care or love in his eyes, like I was some beggar. Mama on the other hand looked at me with concern.

The yelling went back and forth. I lost track of how much time passed, but the fight ended with Adiva yelling; "YOU GUYS ARE TERRIBLE PARENTS! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!! GO! LEAVE AND SEE IF WE CARE!!!". She stormed off to her room and slammed the door, the sound shook the whole apartment.

Baba took mama's hand and led her to the door. They were about to leave and I just stood there, not doing anything.

Baba reached for the doorknob when I finally moved and held onto my mamas abaya. She looked down at me.

"Where are you going mama? Please stay with us, please..." my voice cracked up at the end and my eyes started to water. Mama burst into tears and knelt down to give me a hug, dropping her bags in the process. Mama gives the best hugs ever, they were always warm and comforting. This is probably the last hug I'll ever get from her.

I hugged her back tight, and we sat there for a bit until she let me go and stood back up. She wiped her eyes and smiled at me. "I'm sorry habibti, but I have to go. I'll always love you and don't forget that." she planted a kiss on my cheek and picked her bags back up.

Baba opened the door and headed off. Mama waved back to me and blew me a kiss.
The door shut, and now I knew that they were gone forever.

₊˚⊹♡⊹˚₊

3:32 pm on the first day of summer vacation. It's officially been 2 hours since they left.

I'm sitting on the ground staring at the front door, hoping for some miracle that they walk back through I guess. Adiva has locked herself in her room, she'll probably stay there for the next week or so, only coming out to pray or eat.

I placed my chin on my knees, was this it? Was it just me and Adiva? What were we gonna do? The thoughts racing through my head were interrupted by the sound of a bedroom door opening. She came out unusually earlier. Adiva came and plotted herself beside me. We sat there in silence for what seemed like 10 hours, but it was just 10 minutes.
"You know sitting here won't do anything, right?"
"I know," I shrugged, "it just feels... I don't know, it feels."

She looked at me with empathy. "Hey, look at me." I turned my head to face my sister.

She placed her hands on my shoulders, "You know it's just us now, right?" I nodded. "And.. and I know it may seem impossible to move on without mamas and babas support but..." she sighed, "but we'll make this work inshaAllah (if God wills), I know we can." she stared me dead in the eyes and nodded. I nodded in response.
Adiva put her arms around me, "I won't leave you like they did, not ever."

I froze a bit, then accepted the embrace and hugged her back tightly.

We sat there for a while, just crying and being in each others presence. That was enough to let the other know that they'll always be there.