Shizaya: Lost in Agony

1. SILENCE

Author's note:

So... that's my first chapter!! It took me so long to write it, but I'm quite happy with the result!^-^'' I'll try to update at least once a month because I need my time to write something acceptable, so please don't give up on reading it if you liked it! ;-;

Please enjoy! >w<

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Silence.

Oh, how Izaya hated it.

Even if he lost his voice, Izaya would still try to find a way to communicate with someone, just to keep that damn thing away from him. By phone, computer, his body movements, writing a letter, even drawing! He never let anyone to make him stay quiet. If anyone had a problem with it, he would just simply draw out his switchblade and cut him.

Just like that, yes.

But there was something, actually better said, someone else that annoyed him more than everything.

He sure was able to hurt others mentally or even physically, if he wanted to, but there was this one special person, he just couldn't harm, even if he forced himself to do it. And he was forcing himself quite hard at the moment.

Shizuo Heiwajima.

The one, Izaya couldn't hurt.

The one, Izaya cared about.

The one, Izaya loved... but had too much pride to admit it.

And also the one, Izaya wanted to strangle to death with his bare hands, if he could, now.

Shizuo was giving him a "silence treatment". He was sitting on the old, wonky wooden chair outside in the chilly night, on the balcony, lighting one of his recently bought cigarettes. He threw his lighter on the table beside him and sharply inhaled his not first drag today.

"Stupid Izaya..," he muttered, loudly exhaling the smoke into the night air.

He was absolutely pissed.

Shizuo was supposed to be staying at Izaya's place tonight. He thought everything would be completely fine and normal, as usual. They would watch a movie, eat something, cuddle, kiss, kiss more, get laid and fall asleep next to each other.

As usual.

But no. Izaya wasn't in the mood of doing anything of above.

The blackhead wanted to talk.

Sure.

Shizuo can talk.

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Wrong. So, so wrong!

Shizuo couldn't merely talk.

At least not after what his ears were just able to hear from his beloved Izaya.

"You..," he groaned. "You did what?!" he spat at black haired piece of mess, sitting across the table, eyeing him furiously. He swore to himself that he was able to crush the table at that moment.

"Shizu-chan, please calm down... It's nothing, seriously! I'm fine, see? There's no need for you to lose your temper or anything..," Izaya smiled carefully at the furious Shizuo, standing up, shifting slightly from one leg to another, as if he wanted to show that his body's okay, that he can move normally.

"Izaya, for fucks sake, how many times I've told you: "Don't get involved with underground society!" ?! Which word in it is that hard to understand?! Dammit Izaya, you're only 16..." he sighed furiously. "You know... sometimes, I don't even know if you love me anymore... Do you even know how much this hurts me?!" he hissed and in annoyance, averting his gaze away from Izaya's red irises, focusing it on the dark Shinjuku, right below them, through the big wall-like window. It was almost empty, as it was, already, three in the morning.

Izaya cut the awkward silence.

"Shizuo... please don't say that! You know that's not true! He pays me for it, I can't just say "no" now... I just had to do it; otherwise I'd be dead already!"

Shizuo stayed quiet, ignoring Izaya, but the blackhead swore he heard something like "good" coming out from his mouth.

"You know, it's not like I enjoy doing it with him..." Izaya stood up, narrowing his eyes at Shizuo. "We already discussed this at numerous amounts of times, Shizuo. You said that you don't care in what things I'm involved as long as I'm not in life danger." He sighed, visibly irritated. "Shizuo I know that this is one of those things that even I wouldn't be proud of, but..." he groaned. "Shizuo, money doesn't grow on trees! I don't have a job remember? I hate this place, I hate my parents and I'm surely not going to ask them for money, to buy a new place for myself. Hell, I don't wanna stay here after the graduation for not even a day anymore!"

Izaya hated his parents. They did nothing but harm him since childhood, but they kept giving him all the stuff he wanted, just to keep him quiet, so Izaya decided to endure it. Materialist since childhood, could've been said.

"So you had to sleep with Shiki, don't worry, I understand," spat the other one sarcastically, finally opening his mouth. Shizuo crossed his hands across his chest and glared at Izaya, daring him to make another excuse.

He was sick of them.

"Shizuo fuck you!"

"No Izaya, fuck you!"

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