What the goose?!

                  That's not how Dazai thought his day would go. Not in the slightest. He could imagine many things going wrong on a simple walk; a tree falling over, sudden rain or storm, a dog, bumping into Chuuya. Hell, he wouldn't even be surprised if someone suddenly attacked the city right now. But he never expected to be attacked and chased by a goose. Dazai didn't even know where it came from, it just appeared out of nowhere and immediately went after him. The goose managed to bite his ankle before he dodged it. He was able to push it away and start running, despite the pain in his ankle. It was a forceful bite and Dazai was sure the wound was bleeding. Unfortunately for him, the bird didn't give up. It instantly followed him, snapping its beak every time it got close. Dazai tried losing it but the goose was relentless. He even tried to hide behind a corner, hoping the goose would get confused and go a different way, but the bird was going to be fooled that easily. It quickly found his hiding spot and launched itself at him. The detective barely ducked, slapped the goose away, and started to run. Again. And, of course, the goose went after him. It really didn't look like it would leave him anytime soon. Dazai didn't even have to look behind to know it was on his tail. The aggressive honking and the sound of flapping wings were enough to give that away. Every time the goose got close it would bite on Dazai's coat and pull it as much as possible, making the man fight for the clothing, trying to get the bird off, which just caused it to get more aggressive. Now it was also attempting attacks from above, jumping on him, grabbing his clothes or hair, and fiercely pulling on it. As if the goose wanted him to go in a different direction. Dazai would've entertained this thought and probably laugh at how bizarre it is if he wasn't busy fending off this spawn of Satan. Fortunately, the building where the Armed Detective Agency was established happened to be just around the corner. Dazai picked up the pace, just wanting to get inside. He jumped to the door, sharply opening and closing it without even glancing at the goose. Out of breath, Dazai leans on a wall in order to calm himself down. He could hear the honking and scratching, but thankfully the bird stayed outside, so Dazai was safe from its claws of wrath and serrated beak. He let out a loud sigh of relief and made his way upstairs into the agency's office.

                 — Look who finally decided to show up! — Dazai heard as soon as he entered the office. It was Kunikida, clearly irritated that Dazai was slacking off again. The man was about to say something again, most likely a lecture about the workload Dazai leaves them, but he stopped when he noticed the state he was in. Just like everyone else in the room. They all stared at his slightly ripped coat and loosely hanging bandages, clearly dishevelled hair, all of it topped off with a few bites and scratches. Only now it crossed Dazai's mind that he should have brought himself together at least a little bit, but his brain was too occupied with a gratefulness for the safety of a building.

– What happened to you?- Kunikida decided to ask, breaking the silence. Dazai was just about to answer when they heard a loud thump coming from one of the windows, followed by scratching and hissing.

- That - he pointed at the enraged goose, that was desperately trying to get inside. They all looked at the bird and then at Dazai with shock, disbelief, and a little bit of disappointment. Only Kenji was excited at the sight of it and even waved to say hello.

- A goose? - Atsushi asked, puzzled.

- Where did it come from? - Tanizaki added.

- What did you do to it? - his sister quickly followed.

- It attacked me, came out of nowhere, it's a goose and that's just what they do - Dazai briefly answered the questions - anyway, why don't we ignore it and focus on something else? It's bound to get bored at some point.

Dazai made his way to his desk, fixing his bandages and hair, while deliberately avoiding even looking at the goose. He was never a fan of geese. Quite the opposite, actually. If he were to make a ranking of animals he hated the most, geese would be at the top, right after dogs. Granted, he doesn't have much experience with them, but he did run into a few of them as a child. Saying that they didn't enjoy his company would be an understatement. They were merciless. Dazai almost lost an eye. So, no, he definitely wasn't a fan. And he wasn't going to make an exception for this one.