Lost in Thought

Chapter 2

The school day came to a close and because there was no practice for the day so I made my way home. It was still raining out, just not as hard as before but I was still getting soaked. I had to walk home, which I didn't mind even in the rain. It gave me time to decompress and gave for a good transition between school and home life. Besides, it was only a thirty minute walk outside of town. The scenery I got to see while walking was really just a lot of fields of corn or whatever else was being planted, but as I got closer to home it turned into a forest of dark greens and browns. I decided to take a shortcut home to avoid getting anymore soaked than I already was until I was finally on my front doorstep. I dried my feet on the welcome mat as best I could and opened the door. I was immediately met with the strong scent of cigarettes and alcohol. As I walked in I could see my dad lying on the couch with cigarette packs and beer bottles littering the floor beneath him. He was snoring loudly, which meant he passed out. I looked at his hand and saw a beer bottle still in it. I approached slowly and took the bottle out of his hand carefully to not wake him and placed it on the table in front of him.

I then walked through the house towards my bedroom and past the kitchen where I saw my mother making up some dinner, "Hey, honey would you like some, I'm making your favorite!" she said cheerfully.

"No thanks Mom I gotta get going to work," I replied walking quickly past her to get to my room.

I walked in, closed the door, and walked over to my closet to grab my work clothes. Working part time in a mechanics shop really does make it impossible to get those grease stains out. I threw on the overalls and began making my way out of my bedroom.

As I walked past the kitchen my mother held out a container of food, "If you can't eat now take it to work. I didn't cook your favorite meal just for it to go to waste."

I began to open my mouth to protest but quickly realized that would be a bad idea, "Thanks ma," I said grabbing and rushing my way out the door.

I had another 20 minute walk ahead of me to get to the shop that I work at. I looked down at the food my mother gave me and felt a pit in my stomach, it looked unappetizing. I didn't really feel hungry but I didn't want the food to go to waste either. My mom would not be happy if it came back full so I was hoping one of the guys from work would like to eat it. Even thinking about eating made me feel nauseous and the feeling stayed as I continued my path to work. It was still raining and I was getting soaked again. Cars were flying by me and my mind began to wander and fade out until slowly all that was in my mind was the sound of the cars rushing by and the feeling of the cold rain falling on my head. The world around me began to feel cold and dull, nothing seemed to bring any feeling.

"Hey David!" a sweet yet panicked voice yelled behind me.

I snapped out of my trance and looked back, it was Ella and she was getting out of her car, "What's up?" I called back.

"Well the first problem is that you're walking in this rain, you could get sick, and the second problem is you're wandering in and out of the road!" she shouted at me.

"Oh shit my bad, I will stay out of the road now," my voice began to fade out, I don't remember wandering in and out of traffic. I must be really out of it.

"No you won't be because I am giving you a ride. So get in right now!" she was firm, she did not look very happy with me.

"Ok," I would usually protest but she looks like she might kill me if I didn't say yes. So instead of that I walked up to her car and got in.

"Are you ok?" she asked, a very clear look of concern on my face.

Suddenly it felt like something sharp wrapped around my neck, like barbed wire was forcing my throat shut. My eyes began to feel a little pain and felt like there was a buildup there. All I was able to choke out was, "Yeah, I'm ok."

It must not have been believable because she was looking at me like I was stupid and said, "You don't look ok."

It felt like the wire around my neck was getting tighter and tighter, my throat began to feel like it was closing in on itself, it got so bad that as I spoke my voice began to crack, "I think I am,"

She looked at me with pity in her eyes, "is where you're trying to get to important?"

I looked down at my feet, it was starting to get harder the longer I looked at her, "I really need the money."

"Do you really need it that bad? I mean you were just weaving in and out of traffic for what, some cash? What kind of condition will you be in at work? What if you get hurt?" she looked dumbfounded, like she couldn't believe that I would do something so stupid.

I just looked up at her and said "I'll be ok, I promise."

She looked at me closely, then her face began to relax and she said, "Fine, but I will be picking you up after work to make sure you didn't die and that you make it home ok. Now where am I taking you?"

I let out a slight sigh of relief, "I'm going to Pat's Mechanic shop, thank you."

She looked at me and gave me a smile and my throat began to feel a little more relaxed. It still felt like it wanted me to keep quiet and my brain was fighting with it to tell her something. It felt like I lost my voice, so instead of saying something I sat there in silence and I think she could tell there was something more to it than what I was saying because she kept looking over at me looking worried. If I was being honest with myself I don't even know what I was going to say, what had me so quiet, I had no idea what was bothering me.

"Looks like we are here," she said softly, "when do you get done?"

"I should be done by 10," I responded quietly.

"That's pretty late, don't you have homework and stuff to do yet?" she asked.

"Yeah I still have homework to do, I'll do it after work," I responded, not seeing the issue.

"Don't you have to be at school at like 5AM for morning workouts with the football team? When do you sleep?" she looked even more concerned than she had been.

"I'll be ok, don't worry about me, I'll see you after work, but don't feel like you have to, it is late after all," I called back, getting out of the truck and heading inside. 

I walked in the door and looked at the food in my hand and then at Pat, "Hey Pat my mom wanted me to bring you some food!"