Cinnamon & Nutmeg Volume 2: Where I Want To Be

5: Dom

Who do you need,

who do you love,

when you come undone?

~ Duran Duran

Brian drifts through the turn, tight as you please, Skyline tucked and neat. Big, heavy Chevelle can't do it quite as gracefully, and I know it. Feel the ass end slide over, the jolt of steel frame on fiberglass. It sends a chill through me. Not sorry, no less than he deserves. But it triggers memories. Of my father.

And gives me an idea.

"You are one quarter mile from your destination."

I look over at Brian. He's looking at me. It's on, damn it. Show me what you got, Snowman.

His jaw clenches, and I nod at him. He guns the Skyline, shifts and starts to draw away.

Fuck that. I punch the NOS. Early, way too damn early, but I know he knows it too, and this big-block, heavy-metal beast doesn't have the same acceleration as that rice-burner. Speed, plenty of that.

Sure enough, he takes the bait. Always was a cocky motherfucker. Comes sliding up to pass me finally.

"Still a buster," a smile curling my lips. With a firm nudge to his rear quarter-panel, I send Brian into a spin. Dirty move. The one that killed my dad. But Brian's a good driver, and I watch in the rear-view mirror as he pulls the car safely back under control, sliding to a halt.

If he hadn't recovered, I would've stopped. Race be damned, it's not worth his life. Whatever's happened, he's still my crew. My mechanic. Whether he likes it or not.

I need this win, and Brian knows it. He's a Fed, he can bull his way in elsewhere. I got no such option, and no way will I lose to him. Even if it means driving dirty. Fuck the twinge of guilt I feel as I turn the car off and climb out.

"That's bullshit!" Brian's voice does things to my nerve endings that I don't expect. Instead of just hearing his voice, I feel it on every inch of my skin. Nerve endings tingling, his proximity makes me feel alive again. Reawakens little pieces that died with the news of Letty's death. It's a jolt. Like a paramedic sticking paddles on your chest and yelling, "Clear!"

"I had you. Had you beat. You cheated!"

Brian makes a scene because it's expected, on some level – he has that "squeaky clean" vibe, it's how people see him. It's what they expect, and he was cheated out of a clean win. I ain't gonna be the one to tell them the truth, they sure don't deserve it. I look him in the eye, offering a challenge of another sort. Brian can wiggle his way out of and around and through just about anything; I know it. It's there for anyone to see... turning loose an ex-con wanted for high-jacking, walking away from his badge completely, and yet here he stands a legit federal agent on another UC assignment. Maybe he always was. A legit federal agent. Mia tipped me off on that one, before I saw him in his suit. That's not an angle I'd considered until just now. And it opens up an entirely different world of possibilities.

If that's the case, he's damn good.

Brian is, if nothing else, a survivor. He looked damn fine in that navy uniform. Not as good as he does in a worn-out tee and sun-faded denim; that side of him is more authentic than the badge and uniform. I can see the scars still, new ones, see what it cost him over the years. The price he's paid for handing me my freedom and walking away.