Erwin Headcannon no. 3

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Dad jokes

(I promise Imma eventually get to the more romantic headcannons bUT HEAR ME OUT-)

Commander Eyebrows is the MASTER of dad jokes.

Dude may not be a father himself, but let's be honest.

All his subordinates are his children.

He's always so serious during meetings and speeches, but behind closed doors?

A menace. Unrelenting as he finally has a chance to rattle off some of his own father's favorite jokes to his friends.

9 times out of 10, he'll remain professional. Maybe one or two corny jokes will slip out, but he'll keep it polite.

Give him a few drinks, or get him comfortable with his closest friends though?

One time Levi stated he was thirsty, when referring to his now empty cup of tea.

Cue an evil grin from Erwin.

"Hello thirsty, I'm Erwin."

Levi threatened to retire early from the Survey Corps.

That time Mike forgot something in Erwin's office after taking his leave?

"Long time no see, stranger."

Mike told him he smelled like a bitch while rolling his eyes.

Seriously, this man can't not be such a dad.

One time, Nike Dok asked his old friend how things were going for him now that he was commander of the survey corps.

Not missing a beat, "Living the dream."

Modern AU Erwin would answer phone calls with " 'yello?' "

"What's the damage?" He'd ask Hange whenever they would present to him the document that recorded the yearly costs of the Scout Regimen.

A young Eren once made a comment about the difficulties of life as a teenager in the scouts.

"Well, when I was your age-"

Mans slaps his thigh when hearing a funny joke.

Overall headcannon that Erwin is A Dad.



~Lynn

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