The Adventures of Jones & Walter

Out of the Milky Way

Present Day

"Ow! Shoot." Walter stood in The Daredevil bathroom. It had been around a month since he went into space. His beard had grown quite significantly in this time and to keep it down he shaves. He grabbed a piece of toilet paper, gently placed it on his open wound that he got from the razor.

He held the toilet paper in place as he rummaged through the cabinets for a band aid. Finally he found a pack of Hello Kitty band-aids and replaced one with the toilet paper. He threw the piece of toilet paper into the toilet where it belongs. He took another piece, soaked it in water and whipped clean the remaining blood. Loud knocking came from the other side of the bathroom door.

"What?"

"Speed up man! I'm gonna piss my pants!" Walter opened the door a crack and stuck his head out.

"Password?" Jones groaned while bouncing up and down then got his face right up to Walters.

"Let. Me. In."

"Hmm, say it nicely"

"Fucking let me in!"

"Nope!" Jones sighed.

"Please?" Walter opened the door and Jones rushed in and pulled down his pants.

"See? It wasn't that hard." Walter strolled out of the bathroom shutting the door behind him. He strolled down the hall of the ship following the arrows to the command center at the end.

The door slid open as he got to the end of the hall and walked in. A big window at the front showed stars as far as the human eye could see. A console underneath it had levers, knobs, switches, tiny screens, and flashing buttons galore. Two seats the shape and comfiness of gaming chairs sat behind it attached to the floor. The white walls indie of The Daredevil complemented the red lines along it with spare suits, oxygen tanks and extra rope.

He stepped over the three steps leading off the stairs to the door and made his way to the chair on the left. Walter looked at the screens on the console. Oxygen control? Where it's supposed to be. Gravity? Same as Earth's, everything's in order. He turned his attention to the window and watched the stars pass. The sound of the toilet flushing echoed through the ship soon followed by the sound of the door sliding open.

"What did I miss?" Walter turned around to face Jones.

"Nothing thankfully."

"Everything in order?"

"Yes, I would have said nothing wrong otherwise." He walked down the steps and sat down on the leftover chair on the right. He then looked at the console then at Walter.

"It's hard to believe we are actually in space."

Yea... I wonder how Atlas is doing." Walter turned to Jones and looked at him.

"Atlas?" 

"My little sister. She's out of collage and is currently engaged, but i still wonder if she's safe and healthy." Tears started rolling down his face. Walter stood up, pulling Jones up with him, and began giving him a huge hug. "I miss her" He hugged him back as Jones cried into Walter's shoulder. Minutes passed and they stayed like that, hugging while Jones cried. Slowly Jones calmed down and pulled away from the hug.

"Better?"

"Yea, thanks man"

"No problem. Uhhh also." Walter pointed at his shoulder which had a string of snot connecting it to Jones' nose. "Go grab a Kleenex." Jones whipped his nose with the back of his hand then looked at it.

"Oh shit, you keep watch! I'll be right back!" He ran out of the room, trying not to drop snot all over the floor. Walter turned to the console and looked at it. Small circles close together started appearing on the radar. He looked out the front window to get a better look at what was coming.

"Shh... crap... Asteroids!" He ran to Jones' seat, buckled in, and turned off the autopilot.

"Autopilot disengaged." Came over the speaker of the ship in a woman's voice. Footsteps ran through the hall and the doors slid open to the command center.

"Why is autopilot off? Ooh shit."

"Jones get in the goddamn chair and help me!" He bolted to the chairs and hesitated before sitting in the empty one.

"But this isn't my chair?"

"That shouldn't matter right now!"

"Fineeee '' He sat down and buckled himself in and grabbed the levers. Left and right the ship swung as Walter steered the ship away from the asteroids, or at least for a little bit.

CRASH! Jones peared at the console looking at the map of the ship.

"B 9, Hit."

"This is not the time for Battle Ship References!"

"Then let me steer!"

"Fine!" The ship slowly tilted to the right due to the hit wing, making it harder and harder to stand up. Jones quickly unbuckled and stood up, balancing himself against the pilot seat to not fall tumbling to the right. The more they turned to the right the more they became closer to hitting an asteroid dead on.

"Get up!" Jones shouted.

"I can't!" Walter shouted back.

"Then move your arms!" Walter immediately let go of the throttles and Jones plopped down onto his lap. Jones gripped the throttle pushing them forward causing The Daredevil to take a dive.

"Look!" Walter pointed ahead past some asteroids to a clearing. "There's an opening!" Jones moved his left hand off the throttle and pushed a lever, increasing the speed of the ship. Quickly asteroids closed in on the ship the closer they got to the clearing.

"We arn't going to make it!"

"Shut up!" He sped up, having to lean forward to increase the speed. Asteroids collided into the ship, setting off the alarm. Red lights flashing as the siren seemed to be getting louder and louder. Walter shut his eyes and wrapped his arms around Jones, as if it were to prevent him from dying. He could feel the speed accelerating as the scratching from the asteroids got louder. Suddenly everything stopped at once.

"WOO HOO!" Jones lept off Walter's lap. "FUCK YEA!!" Walter's eyes slowly opened adjusting to the light as he looked out the window in front of him. Nothing stood in front, nothing! He turned to the left, Jones hopped around shoving his fists in the air.

"THAT'S WHAT I CALL THE JONIEZ DRIFT!" Walter put his hand to his heart, after a few minutes he spoke.

"153..." He stopped jumping and looked at Walter.

"Huh?"

"153 beats per minute." He unbuckled his seat belt slowly standing up.

"Holy shit man are you okay?" Jones set a hand on his shoulder as if to steady him.

"Never better!" His once concerned face turned back to overjoyed in an instant, continuing jumping around with his fists in the air, but this time with Walter at his side.

"Okay, okay we need to figure out where we are now." Jones walked to the console followed by Walter. It was Walter who spoke next.

"Uhh... Not in the Milky Way, that's for sure." Jones looked at Walter confused. Walter pointed at the edge of the map as Jones leaned in closer. "That asteroid belt was the border to the Milky Way."

"No cap?!" Jones looked at Walter, he stood there with a big smile on his face as he nodded. "Holy shit... HOLY SHIT! We are actually in outer space"

"Yup!" They stared out the window, watching the stars pass as the siren blared in the background.

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IM SO SORRY EVERYONE!! This chapter was supposed to be out lastnight but i got disctracted finishing my Mysterion cosplay then got distracted finishing HunterxHunter sooooooo yea. ANYWAYS! Ik this chapter sucks, but the next one will be WAYYYY BETTER!

-Bria Patten

Word count: 1243)