It's the eleventh of May.
Which means..
It's my birthday today.
Me and my mom have started cleaning out the house since morning. I was pretty sore, even if its my own big day. I'm officially 15 now.
After my shower, I pampered myself and wore the black dress that I was gifted from a close family. And the earrings which were gifted to me by my grandma. And also the heels which were.. also gifted.. to me by one of my friends in middle school.
Most of the things I wore today were gifts given to me at different times by different people.. which was a weirdly comical coincidence.
Before entering the living room, I put my favourite perfume on. And the scarf from the earlier day fell off the chair. I decided to take it with me as well.
The day was just boring as ever. I couldn't call it a birthday party, really. It was more of a family get-together at my grandma's place. Nothing special. I bet half the people here don't know the reason they're here for.
I'll have my 'actual' birthday party with my friends later this month. For today, it was just family and neighbours. I'll get to pick the drinks that day, which I appreciate of my friends. My face muscles started hurting of all the fake smiling I had to do today. I hadn't smiled this much the entire year. I just have to get through today, really.
My mom said we could stay at my grandma's today, if I'm too tired to go home. I said yes please. My bid us goodbye and left for home. After that, my grandma pulled out the sheets and the pillows out the old cupboards she had, inherited from 'her' grandmother.
I removed my makeup and clothes and prepared myself a mild, bubbly bath. I don't remember the last time I used a bathtub. I always prefer the shower.
I got in the tub and lathered myself with all sorts of soaps and gels my aunt uses when she's in Bangladesh. It's prolly gonna get expired by the time she returns back to Bangladesh, anyway.
I had the stupidest idea to see how long I could hold my breath under water. 2 whole minutes. An achievement made. I pulled my foamy hair back and used the shower-head to wash up.
I remembered him.
I was curious to know if he had thought of me again.
Or even wants to.
And I wanted to get to know him again. And ask him all the questions left unasked, and unanswered.
Hell, I don't even know his name!
But one thing I know, for sure. I want to see him again.
Get to know him again.
Find him whispering unintelligible things in my ears.
Just by thinking of him looking into my eyes like he did the last time, it felt warm. Somewhere deep down.
I wondered if I should do it while I think of him. But I was also scared. I hadn't tried this while thinking of anyone before. But lust ran over my thoughts. I turned on the tap to prevents my moans from being heard outside, although I know no one was in the room.
I pleasured myself that night. Thinking of him. His hands roamed all over my body, discovering each and every inch of it. Muffled moans threatened to come out of my mouth. I was truly enjoying this. Him. I'm all for him. I let him take it all to him. And in return, I took all of him. Inside of me.
Only he wasn't there.
Regardless, I didn't let the thought of loneliness take over and managed to enjoy myself.
