Journey

Chapter 11

November 19, 2015

Fast forward about thirty weeks when the much anticipated baby Costia is finally a very noisy and demanding part of Jennie and Lisa's lives. Costia is six days old and as tiny as she is, she also happens to be the most magical thing Lisa has ever laid eyes on.

Lisa doesn't consider herself to be of imposing height or overall size, but around her daughter she feels massive. It makes Lisa's handling of Costia that much more of an event. Lisa is delicate almost to a ludicrous extreme because she is genuinely worried she could hurt the newborn. As terrified as Lisa may be to take care of this child by herself and as utterly exhausted as she has been for the past week, she is aware that Jennie had a hard labor and anytime Lisa can manage to give her wife even five extra minutes of sleep, she does. Tonight was one of those nights.

Lisa woke up the moment she heard the baby whimper through the monitor. The twenty six year old quickly reached over to turn the speaker off and took it upon herself to see if she could keep Jennie from having to wake up and nurse the baby for as long as possible.

Lisa tiptoes into what she can't imagine being Jennie's studio anymore, not since this little thing burst into their lives. It feels like this was always Costia's room, like it was the thing it was meant to be. Lisa leans over the crib to find the baby on the verge of a full blown tantrum. Lisa pauses to take it in.

Even when she's upset and as impatient as they have come to learn that Costia can be, she is still the most magnificent thing Lisa has ever come across. It's why Lisa always hesitated to hold her. Lisa has never been insecure. She has the ability to stand in a courtroom and make menacing men tremble, but this baby makes her more scared than she can ever recall being at any point before.

Costia wails and Lisa knows the only way she can try and address the crying is if she picks up her daughter. Lisa takes a deep, centering breath and reaches for the six day old. Lisa's grip is firm, she grabs the baby as tightly as she thinks she can without hurting her.

"Hey... shhh. You were up an hour ago. We have to let mommy sleep a little longer."

Lisa's voice soothes the baby ever so slightly, but Costia continues to whimper and wiggle restlessly in Lisa's arms. Lisa begins to sway in an attempt to further calm the peeved baby.

"Come on baby girl. Shhhh..."

The bouncing seems to do the trick and Costia becomes noticeably calmer. Within seconds she opens her eyes to look up at Lisa.

"Hi. There you are." Costia blinks a few times and looks directly at her mother. Lisa can't help but smile. "If I tell you a story do you think we can put off the nursing thing for a little while longer?"

Costia grumbles but Lisa walks over to the postcard, which is now framed next to the baby's changing table, and starts talking regardless.

"Let me tell you about the day I found out you existed."

Lisa stands across from the piece, swaying, and whispering to the fussy baby in her arms. Costia isn't as angry as she was two minutes ago but she's certainly not happy.

"I was assisting with this big case. Some fraud and embezzlement at Polaris corporation. I told you all about it when you were in mommy's tummy, remember? We had a discovery hearing in a few days. I had been really stressed because it was my job to put that all together so that my ADA could review it and take it to the judge. I was busy and your mommy had been really grumpy. Between how stressed we both seemed to be and how much time I was spending at work, I think we hadn't been our best for a little bit."