𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃 | the 100

05 | Bribes

"If you weren't a heartless asshole, you'd understand."

‧ ✩ ｡ ✭ ° ☆ ･ _______ ･ ☆ ° ✭ ｡ ✩ ‧

When they finally find Jasper, it's not with triumphant cheers or even with relieved smiles. It's with stifling horror. His limp body is strung up in a barren tree at the center of a small clearing, and his bruised face droops to the side.

"Oh my god," Clarke breathes.

Behind her, Amber stares in sedated panic. If he's not already dead then he will be soon, an ugly mess of thick blood cakes his exposed chest, and the world blurs as it stares back at her. She can't bear the sight of it, but she can't look away either. She has to stop the bleeding.

"We can't leave him there," she says blankly to whichever of the vague figures around her will listen.

If she gets a response, she can't hear, the chaos in her mind drowns everything else out. Thoughts spiral, looping over and over until she chokes on them. Stop the bleeding. I have to stop the bleeding. Her chest tightens.

A light pressure on her shoulder interrupts the spiral, and Amber blinks rapidly. It's Jules.

"Amber? Did you hear me?" Jules' words are gentle, but Amber struggles to understand them. When she sees how Amber can't form an answer, Jules' smile falters for just a second before she steps closer, blocking Amber's view of Jasper's body.

"It's okay, we won't leave him," she promises firmly. "He's still alive."

Amber's gaze grips onto Jules' face and devours the warmth of her brown eyes with desperation. Slowly, she feels life return to her. As the sight of Jules' face and the pressure of her hand on Amber's shoulder bring the world back into focus, the faces of the figures surrounding them clear.

Everyone has turned to her. Clarke, Wells, Finn, Bellamy, Murphy—they all stare with confusion and concern etched on their faces. Shame crashes over her and she recoils, stepping back and letting Jules' hand slip from her shoulder.

"Sorry," she blurts. "I'm sorry, I'm fine. I'm just... squeamish."

But the hollow stares of the group tell her they don't believe a word of it, like they're all waiting for her to shatter completely. The knot in her chest squeezes, but she ignores it. She has to. To prove that she won't fall apart, she grits her teeth to keep a strong face and moves Jules aside to confront the sight of Jasper.

"Come on, we need to get him down," she tells them, nodding in his direction.

Finally, Clarke breaks the silence. "Alright," she says, eyes still fixed on Amber as she backs away. "Wait here."

"No, I'm fine," she insists.

That seems to be enough for Bellamy, who brushes past her, setting the rest of the group into motion. Clarke finally shifts her focus to the task at hand.

"Just go," Amber snaps at Jules, who still lingers. She can't take more of the humiliation. Jules nods reluctantly before she turns around and hurries after the others.

Amber takes a moment to watch the group run towards the tree and tries to force herself to believe the words she repeats in her mind. Jasper won't die. Clarke was a great medical apprentice, she will fix this, she will save him. He's in safe hands, she tells herself. She digs bitten nails into her palms, focusing on the sharp sting to keep the still persisting panic at bay. Safe hands.