Christmas rolled around, and Hoseok didn't look forward to spending the holiday alone. Saint-like as always, Jimin extended the hand of charity again, and allowed Hoseok to tag along to the kims home for Christmas.
Hoseok tried to stay out of the way there, not wanting to make anyone remember that their hatred carried enough authority to kick him out. Jimin kept Hoseok by his side, though, so he made sure Hoseok didn't break anything. Hoseok ruined everything he touched, always had, so he was relieved that Jimin's watchful eyes could stop any disasters from occurring.
At one point on the way back from the toilet, he overheard a snippet of dialogue through the kitchen door. It was between Jimin and kim Namjoon—Jimin's ex."He's a nerd, sure," the boy said. He made a derisive sound, laughing at the very thought of him.
"But of course I'll support you no matter what. What you do is your business. And we all love you, Jimin." Hoseok cringed, heart pounding. He was at least grateful that, despite how much Namjoon despised Hoseok, the boy had consented to letting Jimin keep him at the Christmas party.
Winter thawed into spring. One afternoon, Jimin decided he'd like to eat picnic-style on a patch of grass in a place that happened to be Hoseok's favourite park. Hoseok casually mentioned this, and Jimin laughed and said obviously, and Hoseok shut up.After they'd had their picnic, they sat on the grass and looked out on the beautiful landscape, and Jimin began talking."Hobi," he said, because they'd decided a while back that calling each other by their nicknames in conversation was easier.
"I'm so happy. This past year has genuinely been the best year of my life." Hoseok wasn't sure why Jimin thought this, but he could remember a few lovely moments—some brilliant restaurants, the smiling of jeon and the kims siblings, the many successful cases during internship—that could understandably account for it."I'm so grateful for every second," Jimin went on, which also made sense, because he'd spent so long thinking he was going to die a teenager.
Jimin shifted into a stranger position, half-sitting, as though he were about to stand up, and Hoseok wondered if he might flee.
"Hoseok... will you marry me?"
The jug of lemonade next to them shattered. Jimin jumped, startled at Hoseok's sudden explosion, but Hoseok was frozen."What?"Hoseok barely even understood that he'd spoken, because he couldn't feel his mouth or any part of his body.
"What?" he repeated. Jimin's position, he realised, was kneeling on one knee. In his hands was a ring, and he washolding it up.Jimin's eyes became unsure.
"What do you mean, 'what?'""I—I..." Hoseok floundered for anything that made sense. Nothing did. "This isn't funny."
"No, of course it's not funny," Jimin said, "I'm serious. I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
Self-loathing clawed up Hoseok's chest and into his throat, and the next thing he knew he was crying. "Stop it," he said, although realistically he knew he had no authority to make demands to park Jimin.
"But if this is about... well, I'll keep letting you fuck me without you needing to put a label like that on it. I'm not that old-fashioned, despite what you, your ex and your friends might think of me." Jimin blinked. Insanely, Jimin latched on the most random of Hoseok's words.
"Letting me fuck you? Hobi hyung, I—that's all this has been to you?" The tears burned. Of course it had been more to him. It had always been more to him. It had been everything to him. But admitting that to himself would have been admitting he desperately needed something he could never have.
