The Dark Ring

Chapter 9.

After the movie I felt tired and sad. There wasn't much I could do about it.  I knew Julien was staring at me, I knew he was wandering why I was sad. But I couldn't care less, I was in my own head, in my own moment, not in his mind. I wish I could do something about my feeling, hit something, but I don't think that would be wise because of my arm. So I just looked up at Julien and faked a smile. It was storming inside of me. I don't know why, but I can't stop being. I am just never peaceful, I am a moving fire traveling around the world, I can't keep in just one place, I need to prove myself, do something that matters, I want to really be someone, I want to excist. I snap out of my thoughts when Julien starts to stroke my hair. I am still with my head in his lap. I look up to him confused, but he just smiles at me. 'There is nothing, just feel, there is nothing going on when you give yourself just time to relax.' Julien says wise. I nod and my smile isn't fake any more. He is sweet, he cares, it's like he can see my thoughts flowing through my head. He strokes my hair softly and I try to do what he said. To relax, to just feel, to let my mind go blank. I close my eyes and try to relax, it doesn't work fully, but it helps bits, my mind isn't a tornado anymore. I relax and shiver. I can feel Julien let go of my hair and move a bit, after that I feel a warm something being put over me, he got a blanket for me and I open my eyes a bit and smile lazy. He smiles back and starts stroking my hair again. I feel myself flow away and fall asleep.

I am in a weird place, I am in space, I can breath, but without any help. I see all the planets and all the stars, and I am flying around, I see all constellations but now from close, I laugh, but suddenly after laughing I am crying. I miss everything, even the things I don't know. The feeling hurts, and I feel weird everything is spinning around me. Suddenly my breath is knocked out of me and I am choking on nothing, I can't breath magically anymore and I panic, I can't breath and it feels like someone is squeezing my lungs. I feel tears in my eyes and gasp for air, for oxygen, but nothing will come in.

I  shoot up coughing and gasping, it won't stop and I see Julien panicking too. I sit up and put my head between my legs to keep from fainting. Julien is rubbing my back slowly and whispers things in my ear to help me calm down. When I am calm again Julien gives me an glass of water and I slowly drink some of it, I sit up straight and feel I am all hot and sweating everywhere. The tears are falling from my eyes. I feel bad, really bad. I feel sick and I am tired, very tired. 'I am so sorry for this all Julien, I have got to go. I can't stay here, it's ridiculous, I travel the world, you have to let me go, I am not supposed to be here. You are in danger, I have to go. Right now.' I stand up quickly and start to get my things together. I walk to the room where I sleep and get everything. Julien stands up and walks after me. 'Oi! You can't do that! You made a promise, you can't leave me alone right now, I would try to kill myself again. Why can't you stay? It's not dangerous, it's just me.' Julien says indignant. I turn around with a fire in my eyes and I look at him with cold eyes. 'You don't know what I can do, you might not be dangerous, but I am right now in this second, you have no idea who I am and I would like to keep it like that because you don't want to die the way you will when you know too much. I already know too much, and I am younger then you, but I know how to survive without others.' I look him in the eyes. I see a fear in his eyes and it hurts, but I can't do this. I can't just let a innocent boy die. 'Julien, let me through. I don't have dreams like this, but if I do, I know something has to be done. Or that I am in danger or anyone else. Let. Me. Out.' I say the last three words with more fierce and I might be shorter, but it feels like I am staring Julien right into the ground. But Julien's fear starts to leave his eyes and he stands straighter and closer and looks down with the same power as I do. I am surprised because of this sudden change, but I take a step forward. 'You might not want to live right now, but I do, and I am not going to be the reason a innocent kid gets killed.' I say to him. Julien's eyes widen in anger. 'You are a kid too!' I chuckle at that. 'I might be, but I am not innocent, you are.' Julien wants to open his mouth to protest, but I shake my head. 'This is not the time to ask questions, you have to trust me, I am not a liar, this is not a joke, this is something for professionals.' I say Julien's eyes flick over my face as if he tries to read me, to see me. 'And in which way are you a professional?' A voice behind me says. I turn around and stand protecting in front of Julien. The man walks closer and touches me. I stand still with fire in my eyes while the man says: 'You have grown a lot you know. You have the same fire, I recognize it, I have seen it before, you are just what we need.'  I swallow. I have to be careful. 'We can talk about it if I brought this young man away.' I say while pointing behind me. 'And how can I know that he doesn't have any information?' I laugh at that. 'Do you see his face? He doesn't know a single thing, you know I don't lie.' I say. 'I can see his face myself thank you, and I know you don't lie, unless you have to.' That man snaps at me, he is angry and doesn't believe me, I know him. 'I am sorry, but what is going on here? And how the hell did you get into my house? And don't talk about me like I am not standing right here.' Julien steps from behind me and I look at the man with raised eyebrows. 'Alright the boy can go.' I turn to Julien. 'Get your stuff, take only warm clothes, food, water, money and your medication.' I say to him. Julien nods and start to get his stuff together in a bag. When he is done he stands beside me and takes my hand. 'I am ready.' Julien says it and nods to me. Julien tries to pull me with him, put I pull my hand back. 'I am not going.' I say. 'But-' I interrupt him. 'No, not the time, this is my fight, not yours. Go to the garden and whisper to the grass a place where you can go and where you are safe, close your eyes and mouth other wise you won't be able to get there alright?' Julien nods. I push him to the garden, but he takes my hand and hugs me while whispering in my ear. 'I'll be in America, at the Empire State Building waiting for you.' He pulls back and I see him disappear in the garden. 'Well, now we're finally alone, lets get this over with.' The man says it with a mean tone and while I smile at him I pack up my bag and say: 'I don't think so.' I disappear into the ground and after a second I am in America looking up at the Empire State Building. I walk towards the building and I see a person laying on the ground crying. The second I realize who it is I run towards Julien. I rub his back and I make him look up at me. I wipe his tears away. 'I know, I am here.' I tell him. I help him stand up and take him to an place with less people where we can sit on a bench. 'I'll take you to your parents and I'll move on. It's not safe for you to go back.' Julien shakes his head. 'I am not going back now. I never was happy back there, I am not dragging them in my mess, this mess either.' I watch Julien careful. 'Julien, I will think about it, but there is so much you don't know. And there are things you don't want to know, or see, you'll be ruined for life. But I have to think about because it means that I'll have someone to watch out for, I am not used to that, and it will not get easier for me. You should know that. But now we are going to book an hotel room for us and then we'll think about it.' Julien nods and he stands up offering his hand to me and looking me right into my eyes. I look back for a second and look down at his hand. I take his hand and I see Julien's face light up, the tears are still rolling over his face, but he smiles through it.