murderous intent

CHAPTER 4 (TRAUMA)

THIS IS MY ORIGINAL STORY, I MADE THE CHARACTERS AND PLOT. PLEASE DO NOT USE MY CHARACTER OR PLOT UNLESS YOU ASK. THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING

The car ride is so quiet you would believe no one was in the car at all. Her mind was another story, it was as if she was back in the highschool lunchroom, Yelling, unstoppable yelling, her mind was as if a dozen people were talking at the same time Then suddenly the voices stopped and she was infront of the moomoo motel parking her car. She is crocheting her fingers, and her stomach was twisting as a knot formed in her throat, ‘what if he doesnt want to see me, what if he tries to hurt me,what if he's not the same-’ the voices in her mind didnt stop till she saw a figure watching her from behind the building, the figure whispered "you got this Love, calm down."She immediately knew who it was, "thank you Lue'scious." She heard him in her head, he dead panned "yeah your trauma is giving me a headache…AND IM DEAD." he was excruciating to listen too, maybe even worse than the voices. " no one cares shut up." She jumped out of her car and speed walked towards the short young receptionist, her eyes were wide set and bored, she was chewing gum and had to be in highschool, her blonde straight hair was a disheveled mess and her hands looked delicate as she typed. Libi put on her best fake smile “hi i'm here to see Ambrose he checked in sometime yesterday, we have a meeting, i seem to have forgotten the room number.” the woman at the desk didnt even look up from her computer as she muttered “216.”

Libitina was getting light headed and nauseous as she took her time finding the room. As she walked past 213 the knot in the throat got tighter and butterflies flew through her stomach, she suddenly felt old feelings resurfacing. Libi stood infront of room 216 with her hand raised to knock, but the voices in her head were getting to her ‘he doesnt want to see you’ ‘you're a useless waste of space he doesnt care to see you.’ she began grabbing balls of her own hair and slid down the wall to the floor, her breath quickened and the voices got louder ‘you are bothering everyone just kill yourself’ ‘i bet no one would miss you if you did it anyways’ the voices laughed at her and repeated the same lines over and over again as her nails dug into the palm of her hand and she tried to calm herself…(in the room)Ambrose was sitting on the couch of his motel room watching the news, his life was falling apart,his father was an abuser and a rapist and he knew this, all though no one believed him. They all saw his father as the kind hearted club owner, he had the scars to prove it…coincidentally so did his bestfriend. When he was around 16 he was always at his bestfriend Libitina’s house, he always called her ti-ti, one day she asked to go to his house, he didnt want her to get hurt so he said no. She thought he was playing and walked to his house the next day, when she knocked on the door she heard glass shatter and loud stomping towards the door. When the door opened she was met with a man,he was wearing sweatpants but he was not wearing a shirt he had to be about 5’7, he was built as if he lived in a gym with broad shoulders and bulky arms he smelled of strong liquor “oh, sorry i think i have the wrong house,” she smiled. The smile was stripped off her face when she saw Ambrose on the couch behind the man, glass in his arm and blood pouring out. Her face molded into pure terror, which the man must have noticed as he turned around to follow her eyes. When he realized what she saw, he dragged her into the house by her arm. She tried to fight, kicking and screaming to no avail, the man was far too strong. Ambrose turned his head to the screaming.  To his horror, his bestfriend was being thrown into his house, the door slamming as his father threw her to the floor, “Dad leave her alone she doesnt have anything to do with this, PLEASE,” he was begging with all of his being. He was only 16 and he was quite skinny, being he was starved by his father. His dad towered over the girl who was on the floor and slowly bent her arm back “Shut up you insignificant useless bit-,” his sentence was cut by the ear piercing scream of Libitina, he had popped her shoulder out of the socket so that she couldnt fight. “Dad please im begging you,” he was now pouring his emotions out of his eyes. His father has brought women he’s drugged home before, he doesnt know what happened to them he just knows it wasn’t legal. “This isnt right DAD SHE'S ONLY 16” he cried out ignoring his wounds completely. His father got up and dragged the boy into the bathroom, beating him unconscious. When Ambrose came to, a few hours later the pain in his body was unbearable but he needed to see if ti-ti was ok. When he got to the living room he saw his dad passed out on the couch and Libitina on the ground wearing nothing but under clothes with bruises covering her abdomen and legs. He chalked it down to one thing. He Sexually assaulted her. Ambrose was angry but he couldnt do anything about it in his state, he simply woke her up and took her into the bathroom to put her in the bath. After running the cold water he started “Ti-ti im so sorry,” he couldnt stop the tears from flowing “,i didnt mean for this to happen, i-i swear.” she looked at him eyes a craze, although the pain in her abdomen was unbearable she smiled…almost manically “Ambrose, you told me not to, i didnt listen,i’m an idiot, but i'll save you.” He didnt know how she could smile like that after what had happened. He felt bad abt what he was abt to do. After he was done washing her and giving her his clothes he walked her to the door “i'm not telling anyone about what happened because i know you still love your mom and she doesnt know what he does.” She smiled again. ‘How’ was the only word running through his head before he mumbled an apology and started “LIBITINA I DONT EVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN DONT TALK TO ME ANYMORE AND STAY AWAY IM NOT LETTING YOU GET INVOLVED AGAIN.” That is what finally broke her. She crumbled onto the floor,she felt nothing, she was numb except for the feeling of a shiver at the look on his face. It hurt him to hurt her like this after what happened but he had to protect her somehow. She sat outside his front door for 5 minutes. She was numb. She felt nothing. Her mind was rolling as she dissociated. She slowly stood up, limping slightly as she started the 5 minute walk to her house, since her parents were at work she could be alone. She shut her front door as she walked into her house and made her way,VERY slowly, up the stairs. She opened the shower door and scrubbed her skin raw. The water was as hot as molten lava, it was burning her skin and the rough scrubbing of the loofa only made the pain worse. She felt the pain but she kept going to get the disguisting feeling of the older man's hands off her skin. She felt disguisting, no guy would ever want her, she was tainted. Her mind wouldnt stop repeating those sentences to her. ‘Your disguisting and tainted’ ‘nobody will ever want you your so diguisting’ ‘just kill yourself’. The voices in her head were not hers, but the mans. These words are what he whispered in her ears as he tainted her being. She hated it. The scrubbing came to a stop when the water went cold and her skin was red and raw. She stepped out looking at herself in the mirror disgusted at what she saw. The marks he put on her body were evident. She opened HER cabinet and grabbed a razor blade. She looked at the bruises from where he grabbed her wrists and put deep slices into them, as if they would release the disgust she felt for the bruises. It felt   amazing, like a breath of fresh air, she watched as the deep cut poured a thick crimson liquid. She did it again for the bruises on her upper thighs, she didn’t want to stop, She heard her mom walk through the door, so she turned on the sink,and grabbed a rag to rinse her wounds, she has been taking internal medication classes in high school, so she has an idea how to clean the deep cuts she made. She slowly and quietly exited her bathroom grabbing the isopropyl alcohol to clean her wounds more thoroughly. Her limping didn't go unnoticed but whenever it was brought up she smiled....it looked more unhinged than happy....but she said it was just period cramps...her parents just went with it not wanting to push.