Cowboys and Angels

35. We Happy Few

INT. BUNKER - MAIN ROOM

A seemingly calmer Lucifer strolled through the room with a book, flipping pages with studied nonchalance.

"So where were you?" Lucifer asked Chuck without looking up.

"That's a... long story," Chuck replied. "How do you feel? I healed you."

"Mm. Yeah. Didn't ask you to."

"Son, be reasonable."

"One cosmic Band-Aid on my knee and what, you think we're, we're even now?" She looked up. "Is it time for us to go play catch in the backyard?" A door opened and Lucifer looked back to her book. "Screw you."

"Guys?" Dean called as he and Sam entered through the front door, upstairs.

"Hey, how's it goin' in here?" Sam asked as they headed down the stairs.

Chuck spoke to Lucifer. "Listen, I know I've been gone for awhile." Sam and Dean put their bags down with quiet rustles and clinks. "I've missed a few... million... birthdays-"

Lucifer cut him off. "Yeah, and the second your apes send a distress flare, boom. Daddy's home."

"That's not what happened."

"Hey, these apes saved your ass," Dean retorted.

Lucifer scowled and snapped her fingers. Sam and Dean looked sick, but quickly realized nothing had happened.

Chuck shook his head. "She can't hurt you."

"Oh, so you're controlling me now!" Lucifer cried.

"It's just a safeguard."

Lucifer stared at Chuck, incensed.

"Hey guys?" Sam called. "Uh, Chuck? Lucifer... uh, Dean... Think we can try and focus here? Y'know, end of the world, common enemy, all that?"

Lucifer slammed the book shut and stood. "Enemy of my enemy is my friend." She stood in front of Chuck. "Team Amara. Go Amara."

"You don't mean that," Chuck said.

"You're really not gonna say it."

Lucifer and Chuck regarded one another. Chuck blinked, but didn't look away.

"She's not gonna say what?" Sam asked.

Lucifer spoke to Chuck. "Screw you." She spoke to Sam and Dean. "Screw all of you." She stormed out between the Winchesters.

When Lucifer left the room, Chuck huffed and began leaving the room, turning back to the Winchesters and saying, "Kids, huh."

Sam and Dean gaped and shook their heads.

HALLWAY

Loud muffled rock music played. Sam and Dean stood in front of a closed door.

Sam banged on the door and yelled, "Lucifer! Y'know, sometime you're gonna have to come out and... talk to... God." There was no answer and Sam threw up his hands.

"It's like the worst episode of Full House ever," Dean commented.

The music stopped and Lucifer yelled through the door, "If Dad has something to say to me, I'll hear it from him! Until then, I'll be in my room."

"It-" Sam began abortively as the music resumed, louder.

"It's not your room," Dean told Lucifer.

"It's my room." He banged a few more times and there was no answer.

"Whatever."

The two walked away.

HELL - MEETING ROOM