build me up. (ON HOLD)

THREE

chapter three.
tiktok
october 19th

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I HATED THAT DAMN CLOCK.

It was 8:00 in the morning, and unfortunately, I had to wake up and begin my day. I had work in two hours but wanted to unpack some of my room before heading to work.

In an hour or so, I carefully unpacked the large boxes that took up space in my room. Fortunately, I hadn't dropped any fragile vases or old picture frames, unlike the first day we moved, and I made sure to pay special attention to my valuables. I didn't have much, to begin with, but I had a few fake succulents, posters, and copious amounts of books that aided in brightening up my room.

I had placed a small turtle vase with some fake flowers on the windowsill in hopes of one day buying a bouquet of them to add some more life to the space. It sat perfectly in the crease of the window, instantly making me smile at its sight. After all, it was the one pot that I wanted and spent every penny I had to get it.

After making my bed, I said a quick prayer and began my normal, early morning (slightly late) routine.

Turning the handle and allowing the water to heat up, I paused to look at myself in the mirror. I had a few new pimples pop up overnight, and my hair seemed to be ready for a redo. My short, cotton-like mane stood straight up from the way I slept last night, and a giggle escaped my lips. I loved it, and I took great pride in wearing it out, but this was a funny sight.

Hopping in the shower, I used my scrub brush and cleaned my body, making sure to thoroughly wash myself. I had only recently started caring about my self-care routines, as my therapist ever so graciously spoke of my disorganization when it came to my care.

Is she right? Yes.

Granted, I knew myself better than anyone out there, but that woman could read me like a book. I aspire to be that type of therapist one day.

'Make me sweat, Make me hotter...'

TikTok had a cursed way of planting new songs in my head. The newest song was "Water" by Tyla. I had never heard of her a day in my life until her concert popped up on my For You page a few weeks ago. I had just learned the words and could sing them effortlessly.

I found myself copying the dance moves of some of the dancers I saw and recreating them, stopping when I couldn't remember some of the newest developments I had seen. While finishing up my shower, I sang to the lyrics and dreamt of being a background dancer in an alternate world.

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I enjoyed my job along with the freedom it gave me to do my homework, but walking almost a mile in 30-degree weather made me want to take my joy back.

Thankfully I checked the forecast before heading out which prompted me to do things much differently this morning. instead of wearing my afro out I had sectioned it into mini twits and threw on a black beanie that I had in one of my dresser drawers. It was the only way to keep me from freezing my ears off. I had on a pair of thick leggings that were flared at the ankles (and also happened to have small holes where my thighs rubbed), a simple white button-up dress shirt, and an insulated blue buffer jacket along with my beat-up filas. I was not ready for the winter weather but I was quickly reminded of it this morning.

I just got back from the post office and I was still shivering despite being in the office for about 10 minutes. It was also nearing the end of my shift and all I had left was to close down the office. My coworker, Robert and I  mindlessly chitchatted as we went about each floor restocking all of the supplies, cleaning the kitchens, and stamping some more mail.