Fictober 2023

Prompt 3

Tim absently poked at his chiming pager as he scrolled his way through a case file Oracle had sent over recently.

"Go for Red Robin."

" Hey, um, Rob? " Kon's voice crackled through the line, uncharacteristically nervous, and Tim paused.

"What's up? You sound like you dropped a mug."

" If, let's say hypothetically, an indestructible guy managed to break their arm on another indestructible guy, what exactly would be the fix for that? "

"Well, in that case you'd need to- I'm sorry, WHAT?" Tim's brain ground to a screeching halt as Kon's words processed, and he snatched his pager off the desk. "Connor Michael Kent, what did you do?" Tim didn't even bother to entertain the winced reminder of "Names, man!" That Kon mumbled, too focused on trying to get an explanation.

"If we're being honest, I didn't do anything, it was Kiddo. But if you want the Cliffnotes version, my nephew snapped my arm via headbutt." In the background, there was another voice -most likely Jon- that yelled: " Please don't tell my dad! "

"You are...unsettlingly calm about all this."

" I mean, it hurts like a bitch, but I can't say I haven't seen worse." Tim could hear Kon's nonchalant shrug through the call, even as he got a ping from his phone.

" Oh, I'm flipping my dip, man ." Was what came through their text thread, completely at odds with his spoken words. " I'm trying to keep cool so Jon doesn't freak out, but hooooly shit, help. Also no Supes. I'm still grounded and he rats me out like it's going outta style."

"O...Kay, um, guess I can say is just...wait? Your super healing has gotta kick in at some point."

" Yeah, that's what we're worried about. What if it kicks in and heals it...wrong?"

"I don't even think that's physically possible for either of you. And I think super healing is kinda like how guts work: things just sorta, know where they need to be?" He shrugged, even though he knew they couldn't see him, and spun his chair a few times before Kon finally said something else.

" Are you one hundred percent sure? Because it looks really bad and potentially wrong-healing-y. "

"At this point, just send me a picture or something, because your descriptions are, for lack of a better word, dog shit."

" You sure? " Kon asked nervously, and Tim fought the urge to scream.

" Yes , it's like you forget that I stitch myself up most of the time." His exasperated sigh was met with a strangled noise on the other end of the line, and he snapped out a "What?"

" Rob, what the fuck? Why are you-you know what, no, that's a war for another time. I took the pic."

"Okay then, show me." Tim's phone pinged with a new message, and he opened his app to find...a birthday banner?

It was a wide shot of his family -both the Bats and the Teen Titans- squashed together around a table of foodstuffs and under a party banner, with a giant cake that had candles and little empty shooter bottles stuck haphazardly around the entire thing like they'd let Bart do it. Which, they probably did, considering there was very clearly frosting on the bunny ears he was giving Jaime.

"If it's the nineteenth..." Tim asked slowly, blinking at the crooked 21 candle on top.

" Yeah? " Kon sounded pleased with himself, and Tim could see his ridiculous grin.

"I don't think I've slept once in the past 46 hours."

" Oh, goddamnit Tim! " Came a collective yell from the other end, and Tim cringed down into his seat. Probably should've kept that to himself.