the five stages of grief - a harry potter story

stage one - denial

               "NO! HE'S ALIVE! HE'S ALIVE HE'S ALIVE HE'S-" Harry got cut off by Remus in spelling him quiet.
"Harry, sweetheart, you need to go to sleep," sighed Molly Weasley. She couldn't look at Harry, he looked too sad and Molly might just break down in tears. But no. She needed to stay string for Harry.

Tears were streaming down Harry's face as he nodded and Remus unspelled him.

Harry was sobbing as Remus led Harry up to his room he shared with Ron.

"Harry, bud, I know it's hard, he was my best friend, my- never mind. You will get over it, I promise," Remus explained sadly.

"How..?" Harry asked in a weak voice, Ron's snores almost drowning his voice out.

"Let me tell you about the five stages of grief, Harry," Remus sighed.

"The what? I- I'm not grieving. Sirius is- he's alive!" Harry cried, tears streaming out once more.

Remus hugged Harry and held him close Harry's loud and hoarse sobs being raked into Remus's shirt.

"Right now, Harry, you are going through 'denial'. Do you know what denial is?" Remus asked.

He felt Harry nod, but he explained it anyways.

"Denial is when you don't accept something when it happens. Like what you're doing right now. Saying that it didn't happen," Remus explained, his voice faint.

He realized Harry was asleep in his arms. So Remus laid the curly haired boy down, putting the covers over him, and standing up. He felt some tears fall, then some more, and soon he was silently sobbing into his hands.

"Oh, Padfoot. Why did you have to leave me- and Harry? I love you Paddy, I'll do anything to have you back. Any- anything, just- please." Remus sobbed, bargaining with who-knows-what.

"Remmy?" Remus heard someone say.

Remus turned, wide-eyed, but no one was there.

He sobbed again.

Later, Harry came down the Burrow's steps for breakfast.

"Hey, where's Sirius?" Harry asked, clearly still denying that Sirius could ever be gone.

"Oh, Harry," Molly looked at Harry with sad eyes and watched as Harry teared up and stormed back upstairs, and quiet sobs could be heard.

"He's got it bad, huh?" Asked Fred, looking at the stairs sadly.

"That poor kid," Said George.

Molly wiped her eyes as she looked at the door. Remus left late yesterday, leaving a note that he was going to clean out Grimmauld.

"Poor kid indeed," Molly replied as she fixed harry a plate and took it upstairs for him.

Arthur was getting ready for work, and he looked upstairs sadly.

"That poor boy," he said.

"That poor boy indeed," Fred and George replied in unison.

Molly found Harry sobbing into his pillow, screaming out Sirius's name over, and over again.

Ron was staring at Harry, while Hermione was sitting on Harry's bed rubbing his back. Molly silently set the food on Harry's bedside table and walked out of the room.

Harry followed her out, running to the bathroom.

In the bathroom, Harry sobbed while heaving over the toilet.

"Why aren't you here?" Harry asked.
"Why? Why, why, why, why, why?" Harry repeated until he was vomiting again.

Ginny looked at Harry sadly through the open door.

"Poor Harry," She said.

"Poor Harry indeed," Ron replied.

Denial - The action of declaring something to be untrue

Harry remembered when Sirius had died in the department of mysteries.

Harry hit a death eater with a hex, and Sirius had called out,

"Nice one James!" Mentioning his father's name as he turned back to see Bellatrix yell out,

"AVADA KEDAVRA!"

Those were the last words Sirius heard before falling into the veil.

Harry stared at the veil, then he screamed out,

"NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!"

Remus held Harry back as Bellatrix ran away, but Harry broke free and ran at her.

"Come on Harry, you know the spell..." a cold voice egged Harry on.

"Do it and you will get your vengeance,"

"CRUCIO!" Harry yelled while pointing his wand at Bellatrix.

A red light shit out from his wand and hit her square in the chest. But when she flew back she was both screaming in pain, instead staring at Harry wide eyed.

Harry was a bit relieved it did not work. He did not actually have satisfaction in seeing people suffering at your hands.

And just like that, Sirius was, he was gone. Gone. And he's not coming back. But Harry was not accepting that. He sobbed over the toilet for an hour before he collapsed on the floor, sobs still coming out once in a while.

"There's no way you could actually be gone," Harry started, "I just got my grasp on you," he whispered.

"I mean, you said after this mess we would live together and you would be.. my father, basically." he said in this faint voice, it cracking once in a while.

"I mean, we just got you out of Azkaban," Harry's voice kept breaking and so did Harry's heart.

"And you promised me that you'd be there for ever."

But forever is always not true.

"Best friends forever"

they leave each other.

"I'll love you forever."

and they don't.

"I'll always have you back."

and when you screw up one time the criticize you.

forever, forever, forever.

the lie that is never treated as a lie.

forever - for a future time; always.

always.