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ALEC LIGHTWOOD WAS SURE OF MANY THINGS: HE WAS AN OLDER BROTHER, HE WAS DESTINED TO BECOME HEAD OF THE NEW YORK INSTITUTE, AND LASTLY, THE LIGHTWOOD NAME WAS TO BE CONSERVED, DAMN ANYTHING AND ANYONE. As his parents often mentioned, there weren't friends to be made in the shadow world nor should you rely on others to save you; to become the perfect Shadowhunter you must push past your limits and stick to the Claves' rules. There was no room for failure. So at the age of eleven when two young boys by the name of Jace and Phoenix arrive at the institute, malnourished and sporting evident signs of abuse, Alec's set of rules began to falter. Unable to turn his back on two broken children, the eldest Lightwood took them under his wing—teaching them all about runes, demons, and the delicate balance of their world. Alec became a protector, a mentor, and ultimately, their older brother in every sense of the word.
Now, this shouldn't be a bad thing: even Maryse and Robert encouraged the Lightwood siblings to interact with the Waylands, but when Alec's feelings for Phoenix go beyond brotherly affection, he's unsure of what to do. He knew that acting on his feelings would risk everything: his relationship with Phoenix, his position as the future head of the institute, and most important of all, his identity as a Shadowhunter. So, he kept his emotions locked away, buried deep beneath the facade of a dutiful soldier even as his heart ached with the unspoken longing for Phoenix. It was a silent torment, a love he couldn't acknowledge, and a risk he couldn't take.
PHOENIX'S SOLE PURPOSE ON EARTH WAS TO PROTECT JACE WAYLAND, AND ALTHOUGH IT SEEMED LAUGHABLE WHEN UTTERED BY A FOUR-YEAR-OLD, THE YOUNG BOY KNEW IT WAS THE UTTER TRUTH. As from the moment he had been old enough to understand, Phoenix realized that their father perceived Jace as the runt of the litter; the unwanted son. Being slow to master the art of arm-to-arm combat or tending to a falcon who constantly pecked at his thin fingers, Michael Wayland's disgust towards his 'soft' son was undeniable. The contrast between Phoenix's natural prowess and Jace's struggles was stark, and it fueled their father's disappointment. Phoenix could see it in the way Michael's eyes lingered on him with pride and, in turn, how they passed over Jace with disdain.
For young Phoenix, this revelation was like a clarion call, a mission he embraced with all the determination a four-year-old could muster. He swore to himself that he would be the shield that protected Jace from their father's scorn, the guardian who would never let his brother down. In the lonely hours of the night, Phoenix would whisper comforting words to Jace, assuring him that he was not unwanted, that he was cherished, and that they were a team. So even when their father perished in a house fire and the siblings were adopted by the Lightwood family, Phoenix's promise to protect Jace held on. Watching on as his brother began to smile and laugh, Phoenix was content to stay in the shadows and hone his skills as a Shadowhunter. But when a mundane by the name of Clary Fray quite literally stumbles into his arms, the boy knows it isn't mere coincidence. The encounter felt like a twist of fate, an event that could disrupt the delicate balance he had carefully maintained.
