𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚑𝚒𝚖 • jeremiah fisher x reader

the bonfire, part two.

I start walking around in any direction, trying to catch sight of him in the dimly lit sea of people. As I'm maneuvering through a bunch of drunk people, music booming loudly to a point where I can feel it in my temples, someone crashes directly into my shoulder.

"Watch out," I mumble.

"Sheesh, Y/n. Nice to see you too."

I stop in my tracks and turn around. I know that voice.

It's Cameron. Cam Cameron. Shit. Not the right time for this right now.

"Oh god, Cam. I'm sorry, I'm looking for Jeremiah. Have you seen him?"

He nods. "He passed me not too long ago. He went in that direction. But seriously, it's nice to see you. When you're not too busy looking for Jeremiah, let's catch up."

I give him a thumbs up in response, and immediately start in the direction he pointed me to. After it's almost been a minute of no success in finding Jere, someone tugs on my sleeve behind me.

"Can we go somewhere and talk real quick? You're probably looking for Belly or something, but I really want to talk to you."

I sigh. Conrad is probably the last person I want to talk to right now after that whole Steven debacle.

When I turn around, he's looking into my eyes, waiting for me, and I can't say no. This talk was bound to happen at some point, and we might as well get over with sooner than later.

We walk towards a secluded area, a little bit further down the beach, and sit down in the sand.

He sighs. "Let me start with this. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you were the one who had to help her through everything this past year. There's nothing I regret more in this entire world than hurting Belly."

I don't have anything to say in response, so I wait for him continue.

"It was never my intention and you know that. I was just having a hard time trying to be happy in a relationship when I couldn't be happy in any other aspect of my life. When I spent every waking minute thinking about how I wasn't at home helping Jere take care of mom, or if she'd still be alive when I came home. I couldn't be there for Belly and I couldn't let her be there for me either."

My heart drops into my stomach.

"And I know you won't believe me, but I want to be better for her. I am getting better for her. Stuff is still going downhill with my mom and Jere is taking it so badly. The doctor said that she should make it through the summer but she'll only get weaker as time goes on. The treatments aren't working anymore. My dad handed her divorce papers not too long ago. I think he just wants to be freed of any responsibility of helping her. I don't know what the hell to do about all of that. But what I do know is that I love Belly, so much that it kills me to be around her and not be able to kiss her anymore all because of the fucked up way I treated her while processing what's happening to my family. I'm really trying to show her that I'm not actually a piece of shit right now, so if it's okay with you, can we try to be civil around each other this summer?"

I wasn't expecting any of that. I knew Conrad had stuff going on, but I didn't know how hard it truly was for him to be there for Belly while thinking of himself and his family at the same time.

"I'm so sorry, Conrad," I whisper under my breath, bringing him into a hug.

"I don't know what I'll do when she's gone," he mutters into my chest, his voice breaking as he says it.

I pull away from him, the expression on his face unlike any I've ever seen on him. He looks more like Jeremiah in this moment, his face softened and delicate looking.