Drowning

Nine

A/N: last chapter! I've loved writing this story, let me know what you guys thought of it!

I went right to form as instructed by my parents the next morning and sighed.

Anxiety was taking over, I felt as if everyone was staring at me as if the walls were closing in on me.

I sat next to two and leaned into him, I'm going to miss sitting next to him at form every day. He's the only reason I get through the school day when the bullying is going on. At least that is over...I still don't feel like I belong at Truham, but having Tao and Isaac by my side helps a lot.

Tao looked at me with worry painted in his eyes, I hate that I stress him out most of the time. "You alright?" Tao wondered.

"When have I ever been alright?" I tried to joke to lighten up the mood but Tao gave me a stern look. I sighed, giving in "I'm just feeling anxious is all." I said the best I could. Tao nodded and gave me a reassuring smile. Nobody knows how to comfort me but Tori.

I checked my phone as it dinged, Ben had messaged me.

Ben: Meet up at break?

Charlie: okay!

I got up once the form was over and looked at Tao, "sat room for lunch?" I offered. "Yep, the usual." Tao chirped as we made our way out of the classroom.

Since it was now break, I started to walk to the library, "Where are you going?" Tao asked, raising an eyebrow.

"to pick up a book." I lied badly and sighed in relief as Tao dropped the subject and we went our separate ways.

When I got to the library, I set down my bag at the usual spot. Ben was leaning up against a bookshelf, looking at me. "Sorry, I couldn't meet up earlier." He hummed.

I walked up to him and shrugged softly, "It's fine. I do have a question though." I felt myself ask, feeling confident.

Ben nodded for me to go on and sat us both down. I blushed and fiddled with his hand. "Do you...Want to hang out at my house after school? My parents won't be home so I—"

"What?" Ben asked, caught off guard. I chewed my lip anxiously, "You know...Since we're boyfriends-" I tried.

"Boyfriends? We aren't boyfriends. We're just meeting up." He said in disbelief.

Oh...

My whole face fell, I looked down to my lap and fiddled with my jacket. Then why are we even meeting up? Just to kiss? Did he even like meeting up? Did he even like me? Or was he just using me so he could make out with someone?

This sucked, "I got to go." I got up and got my stuff together, tears whelming in my eyes. "What? Class doesn't even start for—" Ben was about to say but I walked out of the library, not wanting to hear it.

I walked to the art room and rushed over to Tao and Isaac. "Hey, are you okay?" Isaac asked in confusion.

"I don't want to talk about it," I begged them, trying to give them a convincing smile. They nodded and continued with their conversation.

I fiddled with my untouched, unopened lunch box and drew a sharp breath.

At least winter break is next week.

Maybe getting a new form is the new start that I needed....