Cigarettes After Sex

PROLOGUE

Mace
(Nine-year-old Mace)

"Tangina mo!" He shouted, his face red and veins bulging his neck. I just sat there. Scared that my father might do something to me even if he didn't hit me or my mom. "Ano nanaman ba ito Jerald?" I could sense the frustration in Mom's voice. Every conversation between them seemed to end in arguments, with neither willing to back down.

I slowly moved my gaze from my food to them standing near the fridge. Bigla ako tumingin sa pagkain ko ulit.  "Sino yung tinatawagan mong Mace?" Bigla ako napatingin sakanilang dalawa. My eyes are wide open waiting for my father to speak.

"Si Mace na lang ba talaga?" Nanginginig na tanong ni mom, my father looked at her with guilt. "Jerald may anak na tayo oh! Pero nandiyan ka pa rin sa kabit mo... hinayaan na nga kita gawin Mace pangalan ng anak natin!" my heart suddenly stopped.

"Ano?"

Agad sila napatingin saakin. With guilt.

Tears welled up in my eyes, I couldn't imagine my father cheating... never. Tumayo ako at tumakbo papunta sa kwarto ko. I slammed my door shut and started to cry. How can my father do that?

I heard my father knocking on my door. "Anak... I'm sorry please kausapin mo si papa..."

"Ayoko sayo! Hindi kita papa!" I shouted, I know I shouldn't say that to him but I hate him right now. I heard footsteps fading away, I lay on my bed. Messy hair, tears on my face falling.

I turned to my side and hugged my pillow. All I can do right now is cry and think about happy memories with my father. I'm all alone in my room, and all I can hear is me crying...

—
(Thirteen-year-old Mace)

"Mace kunin mo muna kapatid mo! May gagawin pa ako." I quickly moved my gaze to the side, ginagawa ko iyon para hindi ako pagalitan ni mom. It's rolling my eyes but in a different way.

"Pero mom nag rereview pa po ako..." umirap si mom at ibiniaba si Mathea, nag lakad siya papunta saakin.

"Mamaya na yan! Alagaan mo muna yan!" Sinara niya yung pintuan. "Hello baby!" Tumingin ako kay Mathea at ngumiti. "Hello ate, ano po gawa mo?" Tanong niya at umupo sa lap ko. "Nag aaral si ate eh. Gusto mo ba muna may play or manood dito sa room ni ate?" Tanong ko dito.

I tied her hair into a ponytail. "Nood muna ako ate, gusto ko po yung bluey!" Binuhat ko siya at inilapag sa kama ko, kinuha ko yung remote at nilagay yung Bluey.

"Nood ka muna ha? Aral lang si ate, if may gusto ka sabihin mo lang okay?" Tumango siya at nanood na. I sighed as I sat down.

A few hours later nakatulog na din si Mathea. Ever since Mathea was born my father has been distant to me. Kahit si mom ganon na din.

I feel like they don't even love me anymore. All of their attention is on Mathea, well I'm happy and thankful they are good to her... she's just an innocent child.

—

(Present day... 21-year-old Mace)

I sat down on the grass. The sky is ablaze with a palette of warm oranges and pinks, the sun sinking slowly below the horizon. The air carries a faint, salty breeze, tinged with the earthy scent of cooling grass. As the light fades, the horizon glows with a lingering, golden warmth, casting long, soft shadows that dance gently in the twilight.

"Miss, are you okay? You seem kind of sad?" I turned to my left and saw a guy. He looks familiar, I think he is the guy in the other section. "Yeah I'm alright, just stressed." I looked back at the sunset.

"Do you smoke?"

Napatingin ulit ako sakanya. "Yep, but I quit because my sister has asthma." I saw him nod in my peripheral vision. "Can I sit next to you?" I looked at him from head to toe and gave a disgusted look as a joke.

"O-oh I'm sorry miss-"

I laughed, "I was just joking, you can sit beside me." I said. "Stop calling me miss, may pangalan ako." He chuckled and placed his bag next to him.

"I'm Declan Valdez by the way." He offered his hand for me to shake. I shook his hand, "Mace Peralta." I saw him smile. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, Declan reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He tapped the pack, offering one to me. "Want one?"

I glanced at the cigarette, then at Declan. I hesitated for a moment before taking it. "Yeah, thanks." Declan lit his own cigarette first, then handed the lighter to me. "Rough day?"

I nodded, taking a deep drag and exhaling slowly. "You have no idea." Declan took a drag of his own, the smoke curling up into the cooling evening air. "I think I might," he said quietly.

We sat in silence for a moment, the shared smoke and quiet understanding between them speaking louder than words ever could. "Wanna play music?" I asked. "Yep, sure."

I took out my phone and unlocked it with a swipe, the faint sound of rustling leaves and distant chatter blending into the background.

I scrolled through my music library, pausing momentarily before selecting a playlist. The soft, melancholic notes started to play, filling the air with a gentle melody. Jamie placed his phone on the grass between them, the music mingling with the sound of the breeze.

The song Sunsetz by Cigarette After Sex plays.

As the sky turned shades of orange and pink, Declan leaned back, propping himself up with his hands. He glanced over at me, who was gazing at the horizon, the fading sunlight reflecting in my eyes. We sat in companionable silence, the music and the beauty of the sunset creating a serene atmosphere.

I sighed softly, a sense of calm washing over me. I closed my eyes for a moment, letting the music and the peaceful setting envelop me. We both knew these moments of tranquility were fleeting, but for now, they were content to simply be present, watching the sunset and listening to the music.

"I like Cigarettes After Sex, they make good music." I turned over to him. "Same."

Tumingin ako sa phone ko at nanlaki mata ko nung nakita ko yung oras. "Shit, kailangan ko na umalis." Kinuha ko yung bag ko at iba kong gamit.

"Oh, well see you tomorrow then? Dito ulit bukas?" I looked at him and smiled. "Yeah sure, ingat ka sa pag uwi! Bye!"

"Bye take care."