Tags/Warnings: Top Louis, Bottom Harry, Eating disorder, Implied self-harm, Sad sex
Summary: basically harry has an ED and has been harming himself, but louis doesn't know yet. one day he finds out and turns to sex cause that's the only thing he knows how to do. this basically turned into a whole-ass fanfic. it has smut, but there's a lot of storyline to it, sooooo yeah. it's honestly kind of really sad, but it has a happy ending, I swear. the ending is super cliche and ew, though. sorry, y'all.
54.6 kg.
Harry bites his lip to hold back his tears. He puts the scale away and tugs his shirt off. He stands in front of the mirror and studies his body.
Too skinny here, too fat there.
He sighs to himself and shakes his head in disgust. He looks over at the drawer where his coping mechanism hides. He reaches out slowly, but then he hears a door slam shut. He quickly slides his shirt back on and throws a pink jumper on before making his way downstairs.
"Hi, baby," his boyfriend smiles, reaching out for him and pulling him into a hug.
"Hey, Lou," Harry mumbles, feeling dejected.
"Is everything okay, Haz?" Louis asks, pulling back with a concerned look on his face.
"Yeah, 'm fine. How was work?" He makes his way to the kitchen with Louis following after him.
"It was okay. My boss wasn't happy today. Remember that deal I was telling you about? It fell through," Louis sighs, sitting down at the kitchen bar.
Harry frowns and pours him a cuppa. He crosses over to him and hands it to him. "I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?" Louis takes a sip of his tea with a smirk.
"There is one thing..." he trails off as he tugs Harry closer, leaning in for a kiss. He grasps his waist as he deepens the kiss, but then he feels Harry tense up.
"Are you okay, baby?" Louis asks, pulling back to look Harry in the face.
"Y-yeah, 'm fine. Just kinda tired. Sorry," he stammers, his eyes shifting to the ground.
"It's okay, love. Don't apologize. How about we settle in to watch a movie, hm? We can order in tonight so you don't have to cook," Louis suggests, brushing a curl out of his boyfriend's face.
"I-I'm not really hungry," Harry lies. "I just wanna sleep."
"Okay, that's fine, darling. I'm gonna take a quick shower and then we can settle in for the night. Join me?"
"No, I already took a shower," Harry rushes out, the thought of taking a shower with Louis making his stomach churn. "You can take one. I'll just make you a quick bite to eat."
"Always so thoughtful," Louis coos, pecking Harry's lips quickly before heading upstairs.
Harry breathes out a sigh of relief and fixes Louis a sandwich to go with his now-cold tea. He reheats it when he hears the water stop.
Louis enters the kitchen once more and eats his dinner while Harry picks out a movie.
"This one okay?" he asks when Louis comes into the living room.
"I don't think I've ever watched Top Gun," Louis says, tilting his head to the side thoughtfully. Harry fake-gasps.
"Well, then we have to watch it," he decides, plopping down on the couch. Louis just smiles and grabs a blanket, sitting next to Harry and throwing it over both of them. He pulls Harry closer, who snuggles into his embrace.
