Secrets || P.Parker

chapter 37

warning: strong language, self-harm

Peter POV

after dinner, which I was forced to eat, Rachel started showing me around "So this is the sunroom, this is where we are supposed to make friends and also the place that if we aren't allowed in our rooms for some reason or whatever" we walked around the room "what do you mean by if we aren't allowed in our rooms?" I looked at her as we stopped in front of a big window showing a big flower bed of many colors "Oh if we get caught doing something or somehow hurting ourselves, they make us stay in here until they figure out if we need more therapy or meds or something" she started walking and I followed her "oh okay" I sighed, wishing I was at home, with James and my dads "this is the area for the people who can't be around most people" I nodded and we kept walking until we got to my room "you wanna come in?" I asked her and she nodded so we walked in "We have to keep the door open if we have a guest or someone else in our room" I nodded and sat down on my bed while she sat on the chair of my desk "So why are you here?" she asked me, I sighed and looked down "um I tried to kill myself, they think i struggle with eating and I used to do drugs so I'm very messed up" I looked at her while she looked upset "so why are you hear?" I asked her "Well, I'm here because of my mom, she thought I was going crazy because I had tried to hurt myself, and when that didn't work, I tried to hurt her so she put me in here" I felt bad for her, I didn't deserve to be here, I was not as bad as everyone else in here "oh I'm sorry, how long have been here?" I looked down as I felt my phone ring, it was on vibrate so I didn't feel like answering yet "mhm i've been here for about two month, almost three" i nodded and looks down "do you know how long you are staying?" she asked me, i shook my head and sighed when an alarm went off "oh, its time to go to sleep now" i nodded and she left my room, i left the room and went to the showers room so i can take one

it felt so awkward because there were other men in here watching me, well it felt like they were.

I went to my bedroom and got ready for bed when there was a knock on the door "Hello" it was the therapist, he walked in and made me sit down, I felt my phone ping and was about to grab it when the doctor stopped me "wait you can answer it later, I need to talk to you about something" he told me, I nodded and let him talk "I understand that you have been struggling with drug addiction. It's important to know that this is a serious issue and I want to make sure that you get the help you need. your dad told me that you need help on that" My eyes widen "That is not what I am here for, I am here for my attempt and nothing more, I do not have a problem, I do not struggle with food, I am fine" I said to him in an angry voice

"Peter, I understand that it can be difficult to talk about this issue, but we must do so that we can work together to help you get the assistance you need. It's okay to feel scared or overwhelmed, but please know that I'm here for you every step of the way." he finished and started to leave "Listen, we can finish this in the morning okay? sleep well" he left me alone with my thoughts, I breathed heavily and checked my phone "Hey, I just wanted to check in and see how you are doing. I feel like I haven't heard from you in a few days, and I'm starting to worry. Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help? I'm here for you, so please let me know if there's anything I can do." it was a text from James "I'm okay Jamie, I'll be home soon, I love you" I missed him and felt like I was a terrible person.

I sat down on my bed, feeling like I didn't belong there "I-I can't be here" I heard the door lock "What the fuck" I walked over to the door, trying to pull it open "Hello?! Hey open the door" I yelled out "This is what we do here, I'm sorry but you have to stay here" I heard them leave "Wait?! please!!" I went over to my bed and started getting angry "FUCK" I threw my phone at the wall, hearing it shatter, I fell to my knees and felt like dying, I looked at my broken phone, and saw the glass on the floor, I crawled over to the phone, I picked up a small piece of glass, it was a big enough piece that I could hold with three fingers.

I felt the cold glass against my skin as I pressed it hard. The pain felt familiar as if it was a part of me, and I welcomed it. I pressed harder until I finally felt a small stream of warm liquid flowing down my arm. I watched as the blood pooled around my feet, and I felt a strange relief. I heard an alarm, ringing in my ears, and I heard footsteps running toward the room, I knew I had to stop, but I couldn't bring myself to, instead, I just kept pressing until I finally felt nothing. I am sitting on my knees as I feel the blood pool under me.

bruce's POV

I was quickly called to the emergency room to tend to a young boy who had slit his wrists with a piece of glass. When I arrived, I realized that the boy was Peter. his skin was pale and his breathing was shallow. He had already lost a lot of blood and was barely conscious.

I immediately set to work "What happened?!" I asked the doctors and nurses who had brought him in "he broke his phone and used the glass from it to hurt himself" I started cleaning the wounds and began to stitch them up. It was a delicate process as I had to be careful not to cause further damage. I checked his pulse and monitored his vital signs closely. I also administered a sedative to help him relax and reduce the pain "Why wasn't he being supervised?! you guys know that he was suicidal and he should've been supervised?!"

Once his wounds were bandaged, I stayed by his side and monitored him closely for the next few hours. I talked to him and tried to console him, but he was too weak to respond. I could see the pain in his eyes.

The whole experience was heartbreaking. No one should have to go through such a traumatic experience. I was glad that I was able to help him, but it was clear that he would need more emotional support in the future.

tony sat in the hospital room, watching his son lying in bed, seemingly asleep, but I knew he was just asleep. I was so shocked when I heard the news that my son had tried to take his own life again. I still couldn't wrap my head around it.

Peter's POV

I slowly opened my eyes and blinked away the blurriness of sleep. I felt a dull ache in my chest and realized I was lying in a hospital bed. For a moment I couldn't remember how I got here. Then it all came back to me - my desperate attempt to end my life. I felt a wave of shame and regret wash over me. I had let myself get to a point where I felt like the only option was to take my own life, and now here I was in a hospital bed, surrounded by beeping machines, nurses, and doctors. I suddenly felt tiny and helpless.

I wanted to curl up in a ball and forget this had ever happened. I wanted to go back to the moment before I made that decision and take a different path. But, I knew I couldn't change the past. All I could do was move forward and find a way to make sense of this mess I had created. I saw my dads sitting next to the bed "Peter!" Steve said to me "Thank god, you are alright" he hugged me, and I saw my dad looking at me "Peter we need to talk" I felt horrible "Look I'm sorry, I couldn't stay there, I can't" I looked at them "they locked me in my room, they said I can't leave until morning! they forced me to eat!" I screamed at them "I-I'm not going back and you can make me" I said quietly "Please" I looked down "Okay, fine, you can come home but you are going have some ground roles" I nodded "You have to eat when we say, even if it is just a snack, you have to see a therapist and you have to tell us if you feel like cutting or taking drugs or doing something bad and since you broke your phone, you are not getting one until we say so, you are allowed to see James but that's it." I nodded and sighed "i-i'm sorry, I'm so sorry"