Homesick

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Homesickness is a concept I've never understood until I met you.

Home is something safe, and as much as I've never felt safe before you, I've never been homesick before you left.

I'm at home, but it's cold.
It's always cold, I could blame it on the pills, but I think I got used to your warmth.
Or maybe it's because when it rains I don't try to warm my hands anymore; my own motions remind myself of the way you held my hands when it rained. And when my breath reaches my fingers I can only think of the way yours once did.

I l̶o̶v̶e̶  hate the weather, because the sun reminds me of you.
And I l̶o̶v̶e̶  hate the weather, because you also kissed me in the pouring rain.

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