Ships

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Knife: Come to dinner tonight. I can't cook, but I'll bring plenty of free wine.

Pickle: Marry me.

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Pickle: Bro-

Knife: No, no, hold up, rewind.

Knife: My tongue was down in your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro??

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Pickle: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I'm near mine, I start acting stupid.

Knife: You always act stupid.

Knife:

Knife: Wait...

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Knife: Are we fighting or flirting?

Pickle: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-

Knife: Your point?

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Paper: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?

OJ: It was autocorrect.

Paper: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?

OJ: Yes.

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OJ: I'm trash.

Paper: As someone who's environmentally conscious, it's my duty to pick you up. Does 7 work for you?

OJ:

OJ: You smooth motherfucker.

OJ: And yes it does.

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Paper: OJ and I are no longer dating.

OJ: Paper, that's a horrible way of telling people we're married.

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Paper: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

OJ: Okay.

Paper: And make out during the scary parts.

OJ: Th-

OJ: The scary parts.

OJ: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

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OJ: How the hell did you crash the car?!

Salt : So I was just driving today, right? And my navigation told me to go straight.

Salt : I was like "woah, that's homophobic". Instead, I went gay. And, THAT'S when I got into an accident.

OJ: ...

Pepper, with a proud smile: And THAT'S who I'm in love with, ladies and gentlemen.

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Salt : I'm in love with you.

Pepper: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Salt : I know.

Pepper: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

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Pepper: I'm proud to identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.

Salt : What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?

Pepper, already taking off their clothes: God, Salt , you're so fucking stupid.

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*Salt and Pepper flirting with each other yet again*

OJ: And you two are sure you're not dating?

Salt : 100%.

Pepper: Of course not! Why would you think that?

OJ: I wonder why that possibility would even cross my mind, Pepper. I fucking wonder.

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⏰ Last updated: Nov 27, 2023 ⏰

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