"Is this mailbox full of letters? Or am I just a big package?" Zoro smirked as the younger man struggled to breathe beneath a set of pillows.
"Hmmpfh.... Wait... A second..."
"This'll never work this way."
Upon turning him over onto his back, Sanji stood up from the bed and looked over at Zoro with a dazed look in his droopy eyes.
"No way in hell... You're-" Coming back to his senses, the Cook caught Zoro grinning at him, waiting for him to finish his sentence.
"Yeah?"
"... Out of your mind."
The Cook concluded, sighing out in relief for a moment while the Swordsman reached over to put his shirt back on.
"I'll have to search for something else to use as a substitute for lube. I doubt anyone has any around here... Wait, maybe Chopper might have some! They do have lubricant jelly in hospitals after all."
Realizing that the man was talking by himself and that Zoro was lost in his own world, staring over at his pants that were on the floor, the Cook started to rage.
"I'm heading back out to get that lube. But first, I need an excuse on why I need it... And I AIN'T tellin' Chopper what I'm gonna use it for!"
The thought of Chopper finding out what Sanji needed lubricant jelly for was enough to make the man curl up and suffocate in his own embarrassment.
While he was concentrating on the plan he had, the Cook looked over and noticed that Zoro was distracted by the fabric of his fancy black pants.
"Know what?"
"Hmm?"
"I don't understand how you lasted so long wearing these. They feel like a very uncomfortable material to wear when it's over one hundred degree celsius outside."
"..."
That answer of his was the last Zoro saw of Sanji's patients before the man lost his mind.
"F A H R E N H E I T. LEARN TO DISTINGUISH THEM, NAMI-SAN WOULD PUSH YOU INTO THE OCEAN IF YOU WERE A DEVIL FRUIT EATER."
The Cook raged, throwing punches in the air.
"Woah, you turned really red right now. Look at those cheeks! Wish I could make these cheeks red too."
Zoro teased, making the man's rosy cheeks transition into a darker red.
"Forget my cheeks!! Both the top AND bottom ones too, you steroid freak! AND KEEP THE SHIRT OFF. DAMN IT!!"
In addition to slapping his hand away from his butt, Sanji eyed the way the man was reaching for his shirt and flung it off of his hands as well.
"I'm getting that lube, even if I have to lie to Chopper. Nothing's gonna ruin this night for me."
Walking out of the Swordsman's room, Sanji shut his eyes and silently closed the door...
"Let's see: In order for me to peacefully walk over to Chopper's room, I have to get through Luffy who's right over there, Brook who looks like he's having a conversation with Franky, and lastly... Usopp, who's just about to knock on Chopper's door.
Okay.
I've totally got this under control."
Taking in one last deep breath, the Cook bid his peace and self-esteem a regretful farewell before parting his lips to scream like never before.
He then took off at the speed of light, running as if the Marines were after him.
"OUTTA MY WAY!! OUTTA MY WAY!"
"Huh!?"
"Sanji-San? What happened?"
"What?"
"HE'S HEADED TOWARDS ME. CHOPPER, OPEN UP BEFORE HE- UWAHHHHH- KWAMPF-!"
Usopp's eyes nearly popped out of him when Sanji sent him flying into Chopper's room, shocking the short Doctor along the way.
"Sanji!? What's wrong?"
"I..."
Seconds later, when the man was finally at the finish line and one step closer to obtaining his reward, he froze up.
"Crap... I didn't think this far..."
While Usopp was struggling to readjust his eyes back into place after they nearly squeezed out of their socket, Sanji silently prayed to find an answer to give Chopper.
"It's-"
"Zoro? You in here?"
As if magic, a lightbulb lit up inside of Sanji's dim mind after hearing Luffy's voice from far away.
"MARIMO. HE GOT HIS LEG STUCK AND I NEED SOMETHING TO PULL IT OUT!"
All heads turned over towards him after he spoke.
"His leg got stuck? I'll just punch the object in the way and break it!! Let's go find him! ZOOOOR-"
"NO!!"
"HUH? Why not?"
Luffy questioned when Sanji stopped him from moving by pulling his elastic body back towards him.
"Nooot... Not necessary! Why break the piece of furniture when we could just use something else?"
"Like what?" The Captain wondered.
"What did he get his foot stuck in?"
Deciding to answer Chopper first, Sanji thought of an object that Zoro's foot could be 'stuck' in, hoping to make his lie a bit more believable.
"You're not gonna believe this, because it's not actually true," the man thought to himself, halfway through his speech.
"That bastard got his foot trapped behind the spaces in between his wooden headboard!
What a dumbass, right?
But now his foot is turning kinda purplish and he might look like an octopus by the time I'm done talking right now, so please help m- Him."
Sighing out loud, all that Sanji was hoping for now, was that Chopper cooperated with him.
"Oh no!! Turning purplish is a sign of gangrene! Let me take a look at him."
"Just out of curiosity, what are you gonna do to get his foot out?" Sanji asked, crossing his fingers that Chopper would give him a useful answer.
"Depending on how stuck he is, I'll twist at his leg a little and see if his foot slides out with water-based lubricant. Otherwise, I'll remove the wooden rods off the headboard to take him out."
"Oh, option one will do, our ship's exceptional doctor. Try your best to get him out!" Chopper's eyes lit up at the sound of Sanji's voice.
"I... I'm just doing my job, no need to get all soft on me now, you jerk! That doesn't work on me anymore!!" The shy doctor insisted through a euphoric smile.
"He says this now, but his eyebrows are almost as curly as mine."
The Cook chuckled silently at his own thoughts, contemplating the fact that he was one step closer to spending the night with Zoro.
"Zoro? Is your leg in pain?"
"Huh?" For a moment, Sanji snapped back into reality upon hearing Chopper's voice behind Zoro's door.
"Chopper, wait a minute!!"
Sprinting over towards the Doctor at a fast pace, Sanji arrived just seconds before Chopper could open the door.
"Let me go in first!"
"Oh, sure. After you then."
"That idiot better be ready to fake having an injured leg, or I'll break them for real!"
~~~
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SUMMER HEAT | ZoSan 🔥
Fanfiction"I already told you, GET LOST! You're good at doing that, aren't you!?" "Why are you in such a bad mood lately?" A conservative Cook has to take on the stress of reliving himself from his own sexual desires when an unexpected heat wave causes his bl...
