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      words didn't flow from my mouth like they did hers. she told me stories until it was two in the morning, stories that shooed away the men that lurked in my thoughts every night. she loved me. truly loved me. she was there for me, to calm me when i need it, to make me feel safe when i didn't, to save me from the end when i was about to welcome him. she was the light to my darkness. the cold, clutching darkness.

      i remember, one dark morning, she asked me, in a voice barely above a whisper, what my biggest regret in life was. i told her, our fingers laced together, it was not killing her sooner.