No, Thank You. I Didn't Ask For A Reincarnation

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-Story Start-

In a surreal, white void, Alex found himself—his existence abruptly cut short by a fatal stabbing.

Despite the gravity of the situation, Alex couldn't resist a dry chuckle. "Indulging in pizza on the mean streets of East London gets you killed. Lesson learned," he thought, infusing a touch of irony and humor into the dire circumstance.

His attention was abruptly seized by the exuberant voice of a grinning, bearded old man, "Alex! How would you like a chance to reincarnate in another worl-"

'Ah, it's one of those.' Alex concluded quickly.

Only to be bluntly cut off by Alex's immediate refusal, "No."

The old man fell into a stupor, "Wha-?"

Shaking his head, Alex replied, "Look, Old Man, God, Buddha, Being X, Alien, or whatever you are, from that, I can already tell where this is going. I've seen my fair share of Anime. Let me pass on in peace."

Collecting himself, the bearded old man scratched his head as he mumbled, "They usually burst into tears from happiness... Guess the report on him is true."

"Hmm? You say something?" Alex waved at the old man.

Coughing, the old man replied, "Oh, it's nothing. But I see. Do you truly have no desire to reincarnate and live a blissful and happy life in another world?"

"No, thank you. I didn't ask for a reincarnation," Alex responded immediately.

"To be a worshipped and decorated hero?"

"Nope."

"Erm... A harem of beauties beyond your comprehension?"

"Hell, no."

At that, the old man got a complicated and hesitant expression.

"Are you an idiot?" he asked hesitantly.

"No, I'm depressed," Alex nodded, his expression the definition of neutral.

"THAT JUST SEEMS COUNTERPRODUCTIVE THEN, DOESN'T IT?!" The old man screamed in utter bewilderment.

"I guess," Alex shrugged indifferently.

An awkward silence enveloped the white void housing both of them.

A few seconds passed until...

"WELL, TOO BAD, YOU INDIFFERENT UNGRATEFUL ASSHAT! THE PLOT MUST GO ON! YOU'LL BE REINCARNATING WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. BAHAHAHAHAHA!" Doing a complete 180, the old man roared with glee at Alex, giving him whiplash and a heart attack as he laughed.

But since he was already dead, the heart attack proved ineffective.

Taking a moment to process the information, Alex shrugged, "Okay."

'He'll reincarnate me, and I'll chill somewhere, look for a nice spot or something,' Alex formed his immaculate plan.

The old man then stopped his laughing as he grew a sly smirk, "Oh~? In that case... How about reincarnation in a world set to collapse, and you having the only solution. The burden of saving the world on your shoulders as you wield... THE Excalibur from the Fate Universe!" He dropped the bombshell.

Freezing, Alex digested the information once more.

A moment passed, and another immaculate plan formed in his head as he nodded his agreement to the old man, "Okay, sure."

'I'll just chuck it into some dirty alleyway, let someone else worry about the Fate of the World or whatever.'

Truly, an outstanding move.

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