You felt your cheeks turn red. Here we go again. Every time you saw Hoseok you practically turned into a tomato. How can you fall for someone so much?, you asked yourself mentally, hiding your face behind the papers in your hands. His smile made everything inside of you turn upside down. It seemed that everything around was blooming with flowers and the sun began to shine brighter when he appeared in the room.
You walked into your office, practically falling to the floor. Every time you looked at Hoseok, your heart blossomed...as every time after that, it was pierced by a sharp dagger of reality.
You looked up at the mirror that was directly in front of your desk. Thank you for destroying my air castles every time I look at you!, you whispered, brushing away a tear that flowed lonely down your cheek. How long will you continue to dream about what will not happen? Every time, your heart made your brain angry at you. You were far from Hoseok's ideal type... just like any other guy. I wonder if this will ever end.
You are probably the only person in the world who wants to have a fatal disease. You were too cowardly to commit suicide. A family that doesn't understand and doesn't expect anything more from you. No friends, no personal life... just darkness and emptiness that eats you up little by little every day. But you are an excellent worker, you grinned as you looked at another award recently hung on your wall.
You took a deep breath as your thoughts went too far inside, causing your heart to race. You tapped your fingertips on the hard carpet, trying not to let your anxiety get the better of you. Your time has not come, you told your anxiety as if it were a person. You smiled looking at the sun's rays coming through the window.
You were wondering if there are pills that block your dreams? You thought as you got up from the floor.
...
Every time he couldn't stop smiling like a fool when he saw you, because every time you looked so cute when your cheeks turned red. Like every time after, you seemed to be hiding from this world, trying to be unnoticed. And every time he noticed how your look changed when he passed by.
Maybe he made it all up in his head, and he just thought that you liked him? Besides work, you never discussed anything with him. Even when it was just the two of you in the room, you didn't ask any personal questions. To be honest, you didn't ask anyone anything about him at all.
But he wanted you to look at him. Let it be for a short moment. He was drawn to you. You were his personal sun around which he revolves. Even if you don't notice it. Although he knew the reason... you were exactly the same as him. You were the only one who could understand and accept him.
He remembered how, after meeting you, he became so thoughtful that he went into the women's restroom. He froze when he saw you standing in front of the mirror, looking at yourself in the reflection in the mirror. Although you couldn't see him. He knew exactly what kind of glance this was. He sees this glance every time he looks at himself in the mirror. You were sweet, but no one even knew what you struggled with every day. Nobody but him. Therefore, no matter how busy he was, he was always looking for you to see your smile. In the hope that your anxiety will decrease at least a little, thanks to him. After all, you were the reason he wanted to smile every day. You were the reason his own anxiety went away.
