I haven't quite figured out how my teenage years were supposed to be spent. I always thought I would be partying and going out with friends. Instead, i feel the control of my life slipping through my fingers as I think and rot in my bed. My room would be decorated and clean, straight A student living the teenage dream. I've noticed that instead of doing that all I want is to be seen. I want someone to tell me why I'm so lost. Why it feels impossible to be happy, why I wonder what I feel and what not.
As time seems to go by rather quickly, I still feel stuck in space. Everything moves in slow motion while it's already been 4 years since I've felt safe. Safe from the outside world, safe from my discomforting thoughts that seem to be moving at an unnatural fast pace. I want to disappear but not forgotten. I want to feel better but I don't know how to stop it. It feels so nostalgic yet so new. Maybe if I learn how to breathe, I could finally tell you.
Written by me.
