Annomally?

Spider-sense.

Writers note: I am still working on my other story as well as the prequel to it, I'm just writing this in the meantime for funzies + just cuz I can.

"WADE MOTHERFUCKING WILSON, YOU GIVE ME BACK MY WEB SHOOTERS RIGHT NOW-"

Ah, yes. What a wonderful opening. Best way to start a fanfic. For some context to the random threats right now, Wade had stolen Peters web shooters and was being extremely clumsy, swinging from the building to building and blowing raspberries at Peter while he jumped across the roofs to catch up with him. Childish, much?

"Hey, its not childish, just a bit of teasing, and im not being clumsy with-"

Shut up. Walls are expensive, stop breaking them ALREADY.

"WADE, STOP IT-" Peter said, jumping from roof to roof in a struggle to catch up with him.

"Nuh, uh uh, baby boy- you'll have to kill me!" He said with a chuckle, as he continued to (very badly) swing with the webs, before fumbling onto the roof of a tall complex of apartments.

"How are you so bad at that-" Peter says sarcasticly, chuckling at his clumsiness a bit, as he finally caught him, and lunged onto him.

"You wanna know somthing I am good at~?" Wade replied, moving his eyebrows underneath his mask at the fact that Peter was leaning on top of him on the floor because of where he had just lunged to catch him.

"Getting caught by me." Spider-man replied, as he slipped his glove off of wades hand and put it back onto his own, and got up off of him.

"Eh, one day you'll agree" he said with a small chuckle, as he got up off of the floor.

"That sticky white stuff of yours there was hard to handle." He said with a grin and a smirk.

"How do you manage to make the topic of anything on this earth dirty?" Spider-man asked, rolling his eyes from underneath his mask.

"Its a talent." Deadpool said, putting his hand to his chest proudly.

Suddenly Peter perked up a bit. Spider-sense. He quickly jolted his head up and looked around at his surroundings- it was wierd though, nothing was there. Like, nothing at all. It was just a normal afternoon on the top of the rooftops. Deadpool also noticed Peters change in reaction and he knew what it meant by now, so he started moving his head to look about a bit too. Nothing.

"Huh- maybe you're becoming paranoid, spidey- spending too much time around me, huh?" He said sarcasticly, nudging him a bit. Peter still felt a bit off, though.

"Huh... thats... wierd." He muttered under his breath.

"Y'Know what is actually wierd?" Deadpool asked with a small smirk.

"What?"

"The fact that I've got your shooters again, and you still havnt realised." He said casually, waving one of Peters gloves in front of him, dangling It teasingly.

Peter rolled his eyes in irritation from underneath his mask.

"How did you even-"

"I'm a mercenary, the fuck do you expect? You think that I cant pickpocket?"

"Tochè. Now give it back, you can't even use it prop-"

Peter then got cut off by wade webbing his mouth shut. Was it an accident? Was it deliberate? Fuck knows, but he was pleased with himself for doing it. And a bit cocky about it too.

"Oh I'm sorry, you were saying webs?" He said, snarkily.

Peters spider sense then went off again, and he wiped the webs off of his mouth and looked around quickly and cautiously. Nothing there. What was going on right now?

"Psst, web-head. Down there." Wade said, pointing down into a carpark coming out of an enclosed alleyway where somone was picking the lock to a car. Peter then thought to himself.

Ohhh, so thats what was setting it off. Strange though, it usually tells me where its coming from. Well- not exact, but like the general area of it. Eh, whatever.

He jumped down behind the lady who was trying to get into the car, and then tapped her on the shoulder. Her face completely drained of colour when she saw him, spiderman. But Peter was intending on being relitively pleasant.

"Can I help you, ma'am? Or d'you have a grudge against this poor car?"

The woman then hurriedly reaches for her bag, but just as she grabbed the handle of somthing, Peter webbed it off of her and into his hand, inspecting it. He then chuckled a little, he couldn't help it. It was clear that this lady was definitely an amateur at this kinda stuff.

"A kitchen knife, really? Y'know, i actually find this borderline insulting-"

Peter could just tell that deadpool was looking down at him right now and laughing at the fact that someone held up a kitchen knife in front of him. It wasn't even a big one, OR that sharp! This man had taken down countess villians, survived the end of the world multiple times, and pepole still seem to think that he can be taken down by a kitchen knife.

He still threw the knife behind him, and looked at the absolute fear on the lady's face.

"I'll tell ya what, you leave the car, the knife, and me alone right now, and I won't tell the police, yeah? Cuz I'm not gonna hurt you or anything, I swear."

Can't insure the same for Mr gun-happy above me, though.

Peter thought to himself, but definitely would NOT say that out loud.

The woman hesitated a lot, and Peter couldn't tell why, but then a look of utter and absolute horror appeared on her face, and she sprinted away.

"Huh... I wonder what all that was about-" Peter mumbled to himself, before he heard shouting from the rooftop above him.

"HEY, BUG BOY- WATCH OUT-" Deadpool shouted, a little bit delayed though, because it all happened really quickly. Peters Spider-sense went haywire, and then this black-hole looking thing quite literally sucked him in, and absorbed him.

Wade saw all of this happening from above, as he saw Spider-man get sucked up into a random hole that appeared out of absolutely nowhere. He then just shrugged and jumped in too, because why not? I mean, what could possibly go wrong with jumping into a random portal that just appeared out of nowhere, right?