The Destroyer of Worlds

Blood on My Hands

I'm sitting on the kitchen table, a phone in front of me, as Kitty walks in the room. "I thought they would call." I pointed to the phone slowly, not getting any sleep last night. "It's only the 5th." Kitty mumbled, leaning her head against the wall. "In Japan, it's the 6th." I said, putting a hand on my head due to the headache I've been having. Kitty walked over to me, sitting down in front of me so I'm not alone the rest of the early morning.

In the middle of the day, I couldn't get any work done. All I did was pace my office, almost the entire day awaiting a phone call. "Charlotte? Try Groves." I nodded, asking her for the twelfth time today. I rubbed my eyes slowly, awaiting a response. "Anything? Charlotte?" I asked, beginning to walk out of my office to check on her. "Truman's on the radio!" Charlotte yelled, as I ran out of my office.

"Sixteen hours ago, an American airplane dropped one bomb on Hiroshima..."

I walked over to Charlotte's desk, who scrambled to grab a device that could relay the broadcast to the rest of Los Alamos.

"And destroyed its usefulness to the enemy. The bomb had more power than 20,000 tons of TNT."

My brother, Frank, emerges from his office, as do the rest of the scientists. They just stare at each other in disbelief.

"It is an atomic bomb. It is a harnessing of the basic powers of the universe."

Feynman extends his hand to Bethe, who looks at it for a moment. Then, he finally shakes it, nodding. Tons of screams of excitement can be heard from outside, due to the success of the atomic bomb we've been building for the past three years.

"Groves on one." Charlotte tells me, as I slowly walk towards the telephone, picking it up slowly.

"We are now prepared to destroy more rapidly and completely the Japanese..."

I grab the telephone so tight my knuckles begin to turn white, as I clear my throat quickly. "General?" I ask into the phone. "I'm very proud of you and all of your people." Groves said, his voice slightly cutting out. "It went all right?" I asked softly, looking out the window to see people cheering. "Apparently, it went with a tremendous bang." Groves said. I stop for a moment, my face expressionless. "Well, everyone here is feeling reasonably good about it. It's been a long road." I told Groves, my voice soft but clear. "I think one of the wisest things I ever did was when I selected the director of Los Alamos." Groves complimented me, to which I didn't say anything.

"We have spent more than $2 billion on the greatest scientific gamble in history, and we have won."

I walk down the streets of Los Alamos. Horns honk, soldiers cheer, while waving American Flags in their hands. The people wave at me, to which I simply nod. So many people dead, because of me. I created a weapon of mass destruction that had killed so many people. I take off my hat and rub my eyes, hoping to stop imagining an image of so many people dead.

***

A restless, excited crowd is packed into the bleachers, with almost no room to maneuver, like a high-school pep rally. I'm backstage, having a smoke to try and clear my mind, so that I'm not as nervous when I give my speech. Kitty walks closer to me, adjusting my tie as my eyes remain wide open.

"Oppie! Oppie! Oppie! Oppie! Oppie!"

Kitty nods at me, as I quickly crush out my cigarette, and push open the door to walk down the aisle. As I open the door, all of the feet begin to stamp rhythmically, the impatient crowd behind it all. As I walk further and further down the aisle, I notice the feet stamping louder and faster, until it stops. The crowd breaks into an applause when everyone could see me. I nodded and smiled at them as I made my way to the stage.