Pirate Pleasure

Chapter 1

"I don't have a good feeling about this," Meghan groans as I park the car.

"Meghan, we'll be fine. We just go AROUND the stage. There's no guards on one side," I reply.

We hop out of my car, which was caked in dirt from the lengthy ride here. Meghan gives me a look of uncertainty as we make our way towards the stage.

"I've never done this before-" I begin to say until I see my comment worrying Meghan even more. "...but we'll be fine, because I know what I'm doing," I add.

It's an outdoor concert, and the areas are only blocked off by gates. I know we need to go through the stage to make it back to the front mosh pit.

At the most, we're only 100 yards away from the stage. We need to think fast. I grab Meghan's hand and pull her through the thick forest of tall, scruff, goth guys waiting in line. The line trails up the right side of the stage so I dart to the left and drag Meghan along. Meghan's silver flats have horrible traction so our running is diminished to a much slower pace. We're getting closer, but we're starting to run out of steam. Someone is bound to notice us if we stay out here any longer.

Only 30 feet away from the stage. I'm wheezing. 15 feet. 5 feet. At last, we arrive. I look down and notice that both my converse and jeans are soaked in mud from running through the wet grass. Worth it-I get to go to a pirate metal concert.

With Meghan's hand still in mine, I look at her and put a finger to my lips. She picks up on my message and begins to tip toe as we approach the stage's rear. There's an Alestorm tour bus and a strong stench of alcohol in the air. We pause, and I put my ear up to the backstage door to listen to whatever is going on backstage. I hear a few faint "Yar hars", but I figure it must be the band warming up.

I slowly place my hand on the doorknob and twist it. What luck! It's unlocked! Meghan rushes in right behind me as I shut the door behind us. There's no going back now. We're in the same stage as our favorite band. It's an overwhelming thought.

Now we need to find a way to the stage so we can exit through there. None are in sight, so Meghan and I have to do a little bit of exploring. There's a faint squish squosh as we tip toe around in our drenched shoes.

Suddenly, a door to our right bursts open and noise and light and pirates flood out. Meghan and I stand in awe as we see the one and only Chris Bowes sitting on a broken crate in the center of the room. Behind him there's an attractive woman in pirate attire stuffing doubloons into her shirt. She must be a wench. Chris is concentrated on guzzling a bottle of Kraken Rum.

His eyes dart over to Meghan and me. He finishes his rum session with one last big gulp, and he stands up while making direct eye contact with us. The wench looks at Chris with fear and hurries out.

Without a word, Chris walks over to the two of us. His footsteps are wobbly. I can tell he's been drinking.

"Harr, I'm f***ing drunk," he mutters happily. Meghan and I stare in shock and wait for him to say more. Finally, he adds, "So... yer two think ye can just be crashing into here, huh? Well, ye just earned yerself a free ticket to Pirate Town, if you know what I mean, Yar har harrr."

My mouth has dropped open. This is not the Chris Bowes I had intended to meet. This is him muttering nonsense in a drunken stupor. After a few moments of silence, Meghan says,"Um, no, we don't know what you mean, Chris."

Chris takes another swig of rum and nearly stumbles over. With a smirk he yells, " All ye salty sea dogs, come here! We got some saucy young wenches here thinking they own this place!"

Dozens of pirates respond to Chris's command. They flood out from all over the stage and blindfold Meghan and I. Before I can call out Meghan's name, I have cloth shoved into my mouth. Meghan and I are tied up with a bunch of pirates.

I'm shaking and whimpering in fear as a tall and hairy pirate carries Meghan and I from the stage to the tour bus. He tosses us in like we're worthless. Meghan and I cry together, blindfolded and helpless, until we both pass out from exhaustion. Looks like we got ourselves a pirate predicament.