Unsettled Hearts

One: Claire McCain

I'm fidgeting with the straps of my bag in the back of my mum's car. My heart is just about ready to burst out of my chest, and a small army of butterflies are doing somersaults in my stomach. I am so nervous. "Are you excited?" my mum asks. I am silent. "Claire, answer me when I speak to you." Mum says, firmly. "Yes, mum." a small squeak escapes my lips. My plaits are sticking to the back of my neck. What is wrong with me? I think, as I wipe a bead of sweat off my forehead. I look down at my nails. They're too short to bite now. I look out the window, and notice that the boarding school I will be attending is on the horizon. Chesterdale High School. It looks large. We drive into the school and Mum finds a place to park so she can drop me off. The car park is pretty much empty. I wonder how everyone else gets to school. "Claire. Remember my rules: behave for your teachers, don't get into trouble, keep your grades acceptable, and no boyfriends." she says. I nod. "Yes, Mum, I know." I reply, getting out of the car and going to get my suitcase out of the boot. "Please text us regularly. Dad and I will see you at mid-year break." Mum says, "We love you. We'll miss you.". I nod, and close the boot and take a deep breath. And then I enter the strange new environment of Chesterdale High, bag on my back and suitcase in hand.

I have absolutely no idea where I'm going. I look around. There are so many buildings and only a few signs. Then I see a man holding up a sign that says "NEW STUDENTS FROM DROP OFF HERE". I assume he's a teacher, so I head up to him. "What's your name?" he asks. "C.... Claire McCain." I stutter, my heart still pounding in my chest. "What year are you in?" he asks. "Year 11." I reply. "The Year 11 girls' dorms are over there." the man says, pointing to a sign that says "Dormitories: Girls". I head towards where the sign is pointing. It leads me to two large buildings. I find the one for the senior school students (year 10, 11 and 12), and enter. A short, stocky woman stands in the hallway. She has a clipboard in her hands. A shiny silver badge on her chest tells me that she is the head of the dorms here. "Name." she says, peering at me through her thick glasses. "Claire. Claire McCain." I reply. "Year 11 dorms are up the stairs, on the left. You will find that the dorm rooms have a sheet of paper with the names of the people that are in there on the door. Find the door that has your name on it." the woman explains.

I promptly head up the stairs, having incredible difficulty carrying my suitcase up them, and on the left, there they are. I walk through the long corridor lined with doors, searching for my name. I get approximately half way down the corridor when I find my name, along with three others. Aubrey Jones, Jacinta Spruce and Khloe Bridges. I timidly enter the room. There are two girls already in there. One of them is tan, with brown eyes, pink hair tied into two buns shaped like cat ears, and a generous helping of freckles spread across her face. She has claimed the bed nearest to the window. The other is pale-ish, and has long red hair that cascades down her back, and midnight-blue eyes. Her bed is in the very corner. A wave of nerves runs through me as I look at her. She looks intimidating. I put my bags down on the bed next to the pink-haired girl's bed. "Hi!" she says, noticing me. "Um... hi." I reply, nervously. Social interaction is hard. "I'm Aubrey." the girl says, putting her hand out for me to shake. "I'm Claire." I reply, carefully shaking her hand. "I know." Aubrey says, with a smile. "What? How?" I ask. "You're the only new one in our dorm." she explains. "Oh, I get it now." I reply, sitting down on the bed, getting ready to unpack my stuff. There's a communal wardrobe in the room that we can put our school uniforms in, so I hang up my uniform in there. Aubrey's uniform is in there, and so is the redhead girl's. "That's mine." Aubrey says, pointing to the uniform with the long pants. "Cool." I reply, hanging mine next to hers. I place the rest of my clothes in the drawers of my bedside table, and I place the book I brought to read with me on the top. Aubrey's bed is covered with plushies. The other girl's bedside table has a makeup bag on it. The room is silent. It's like this for a few minutes, before Aubrey speaks. "Your hair is really pretty." she tells me. "Oh... thanks." I reply, feeling a small blush spread across my cheeks, "Yours is pretty too.". Aubrey smiles, showcasing her braces. The redhead girl then suddenly speaks. "Don't you dare bother me this year, Aubrey. You know I'd much rather be sharing a dorm with Taylor Hill than with you and Jacinta..." she says, before giving me a judgemental stare-down and adding, "and this freak.". I decide that she really is scary. "I'd much rather you weren't here too, Khloe." Aubrey snaps. Ok, so these two definitely don't like eachother, I think.

Then, the door bursts open. Someone enters the room. They have short brown hair that looks like a mop of curls on their head, and greyish-blue eyes. I can't tell what their gender is, but I guess they have to be a girl to be in this dorm. "Hey, Jack!" Aubrey says, "Missed the bus?". "Yeah. My dad slept in." Jack replies. "Jacinta Spruce. Late as always. You know, it's really not fashionable to be late." Khloe remarks. "Khloe... my name's Jack." Jack says. "No it's not. You're a girl, no matter the amount of hair-cutting and pants-wearing and name-changing you do, you're not a boy, Jacinta." Khloe replies, getting up from her bed. "But I identify as a boy..." Jack says, defeated as he sits down on his bed with his stuff. "Um... hi?" I say, trying to change the conversation and introduce myself to Jack. "You're Claire, aren't you?" Jack asks, looking at me. I nod, but I notice the tears in his eyes. "Are you ok?" I ask. Jack shakes his head. I look over at Aubrey. She looks just about ready to slap Khloe across the face. I turn my attention back to Jack. "Do you want a hug?" I ask. Jack nods. I hug him. "I'm sorry." I say. "It's not your fault." Jack replies, "People do this all the time. I haven't even came out to my parents yet.". "Why not?" I ask. "They're transphobic." Jack says shortly. "That sucks." I reply. Jack nods. "Thanks. For being nice to me, even though you've never met me and you probably think I'm weird for being trans." he says. "I don't think you're weird. I don't think any trans people are weird for simply just being trans. I think it's weird that transphobia exists. Like, it's not affecting you, why does it matter if someone is trans?" I reply, giving Khloe a look. Jack smiles slightly. I spot Khloe rolling her eyes out of the corner of my eye. I really don't like her.

This is going to be a long year.