Behind The Scenes ༻ Park Jisung

༻ 38

it's hard for me to open up, i'll admit it
you've got some shit to say and i'm here to listen

༻

Jisung stood in front of Jaemins door, contemplating whether or not to knock. He wasn't even sure what he wanted to say but he knew that Jaemin was the guy for it.

"I can see your shadow Jisung," Jaemin called from his room. "Come in."
There was no going back. "I just have a...question," he quietly said, closing the door behind him. The dorm was abnormally empty but he couldn't risk it.
"Hmm?" Jaemin hummed, looking up from his phone.

The pace of his heart slowly went faster as Lucy and Luke purred at the sight of him. Luna was fast asleep on her bed.

"I- I don't really know how to say this," Jisung muttered, rubbing the side of his neck. "But I know you said you didn't like Aruna last time but I- I see this look in your eye and I have to ask again..."

Jaemin furrowed his eyebrows, closing his phone. This was a serious conversation.

"Do you...like Aruna?" Jisung finally asked, the words hanging in the air.
"What?" Jaemin responded, caught off guard.
"Just answer this, please," he pleaded. "Because I need to know."
"Of course, I do. She's a very good friend."

His heart dropped to his stomach.

"But," Jaemin continued. "Not in that way. The way you like her."
Jisung sighed, relieved. He already knew. "It's driving me insane. I don't know what to do."
"Just act normal with her. There's nothing wrong with having a small crush on someone."

That's what was wrong with the situation. It wasn't just a tiny feeling he could push away. He had to push her away. It was getting harder to do though with the dry responses he replied to her messages with and he could tell she was getting hurt.

Jisung didn't want to be the cause of her pain.

"Oh," Jaemin patted the empty side of his bed for the boy to sit on. The silence said everything. "You've fallen in deep,"

Covering his face with his hands, Jisung couldn't help but feel embarrassed about the whole situation. It was humbling to be so confused over feelings because of a girl.

Jaemin couldn't help but laugh. It was his first time seeing the boy so...flustered. Sure, Jisung did have a few admirations here and there, but he had never done anything about it. Aruna must've been different.

"She thinks of me as a friend though..." he sighed, the sound of his voice muffled from his hands covering his mouth.
"Is that so bad though?" Jaemin inquired.
"Why would it not be?"

Jaemin nudged him. "Think about it this way. Wouldn't you rather have a girl know you than just think you're cute?"
"Uhm I guess," Jisung shrugged. His hands were now in his lap, twirling his own thumbs.

Jaemin slapped his shoulders. "No really- close your eyes and imagine a girl who only likes you for your looks and a girl who was friends with you then thought you were a good person."

Closing his eyes with a groan, Jisung tried to envision the scenario, but it was challenging. He accidentally peeked with his right eye, meeting Jaemin's frustrated gaze.

"You know what, it's fine. Let's just-"

"Jisung, Aruna's here for you," Chenle's voice echoed from the living room.