Arizona Sunsets - Sam Hubbard

XXXXII

Subconsciously, Sam noticed movement in his arms, prompting him to lightly open his eyes. In the semi-darkness, he made out Liz's figure seated at the edge of the bed, pulling a shirt over her still bare body.

"What are you doing? Come back into my arms," he mumbled, reaching out, gently stroking Liz's back. "I'll be right back. Just turning off the candles and getting ready in the bathroom. Then I'll be back. Go back to sleep," she said, turning, taking Sam's hand, briefly caressing it with her thumb, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand before getting out of bed.

Sighing, Sam closed his eyes again, wrapping his arms around the empty pillow where Liz had just been lying. Until she returned, the pillow had to suffice as her substitute. At least it carried her scent, he thought, inhaling deeply as he slowly drifted back into the realm of dreams.

A few hours later, or at least it felt that way to Sam, he opened his eyes again, confused to find he still held the pillow in his arms. Liz's side of the bed remained empty.

He sat up and looked around. The bathroom light was off, as was the kitchen light. She wasn't on the sofa or at the dining table. Where was she? The clock on her nightstand informed Sam it was half-past four. Through the windows, he could already see the sun, faintly coloring the horizon.

Sighing, he ran his hand over his face before getting out of bed, grabbing his boxers and sweatpants. He glanced around the apartment once more, but Liz was still nowhere to be found.

Only then did Sam notice the apartment door slightly ajar, and a strange feeling crept over him. Had something happened to Liz? Was there a break-in? He shook his head. He would have likely noticed if something had occurred.

He opened the door and peered out into the dark hallway. There were two possibilities for where Liz might be. Either she had gone downstairs to the café, doing who knows what, or she was upstairs in her studio painting.

Neither were activities for this hour, yet Sam decided the studio was the more likely option and headed for the stairs. His assumption was confirmed when he saw the light seeping from under the studio door.

As expected, the door was unlocked. Liz stood with her back to him, a canvas before her, already adorned with a series of colors. Amused, Sam noted Liz was still wearing his shirt, likely picked up from the floor. Had she been up here for so long?

"What are you doing here, Liz?" he sighed, leaning against the door frame, arms crossed over his bare chest, startling Liz as she turned towards him.

"Did I wake you?" she asked, setting the brushes and palette aside, brushing a strand of hair from her face, looking at Sam with tired eyes. He shook his head. "I was just worried when I didn't find you next to me and started searching," he took a few steps toward her, tucking the forgotten strand behind her ear, rubbing a green paint smudge from her cheek.

Liz responded to his cleaning with a faint smile. "Sorry. I couldn't sleep," she mumbled. "Besides, I thought time might pass slower if I didn't sleep. So, I could have more time with you," she grew quieter with each word.

Sighing, Sam pulled her into his arms. "Why didn't you wake me, Liz? I would've spent the night with you if I'd known how you were feeling," he planted a kiss on her hair, while Liz wrapped her arms tightly around his torso.

"You were sleeping so peacefully; I didn't want to disturb you. That's why I came up here," she apologized, resting her head on Sam's warm chest, taking a deep breath. Meanwhile, Sam scrutinized the canvas on the easel, which puzzled him.

Even though the painting was probably less than halfway done, he could already recognize precisely what Liz was depicting. It wasn't even finished yet, but he knew. Because he had been there. With her. It was the view from the cliff, the Arizona Sunset.

Sam held Liz even closer before lifting her face toward him. The sadness shimmering in her eyes weighed heavily on his heart. If he could, he'd do anything to take that sadness away from her, but he knew it wasn't possible.

"What do you want to do now? We can stay here; you can paint, and I'll stay by your side. Or we can go back downstairs, get into bed, and I'll stay awake as long as you want," he twirled one of her strands of hair around his finger, looking at her.

Liz maintained eye contact, while she pondered, chewing on her lower lip. "Let's go back to bed. A bit of sleep will surely do us good," she decided. Sam nodded. "I think you're right," he agreed, taking Liz's hand, leading her out of the room.

Downstairs, both settled back into bed, and Sam immediately pulled Liz into his arms, as she nestled in with a sigh. Sam planted a kiss on her forehead before covering them both with the blanket.

"Do you blame me for leaving?" Sam asked after a few moments of silence. He finally voiced the thought that had been on his mind the whole time. Surprised, Liz looked at him. "Why would you think that?" she asked.

Sam sighed. "Because I hate myself for it. I hate myself for causing you this pain. I wish I could somehow change it, but I don't know how, Liz. If there was even the slightest chance I could stay with you and still play football, I'd do it. Without hesitation. But it's not possible, and I hate myself for it. And it would be understandable if you did too."

Liz sat up. "Are you crazy, Sam? I love you, no matter where you are. No matter where I am. I love you so much, Sam. I could never hate you. It's not your fault that our lives are so far apart, but somehow, we'll figure it out, okay? I don't want you to feel bad for even a second about leaving, understood?" she clarified, stroking his cheek.

"I just wish there was a way to assure ourselves that we'll make it. Because, Liz, let's be honest. Tomorrow's farewell might be the easiest part of the next few months," he sighed, pulling Liz close, burying his face in her arms. "How am I going to get through the days without seeing you?" he murmured softly.

Sighing, Liz wrapped her arms around Sam. "We'll do our best, Sam. We'll make it work. We have to," tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm already losing a part of you tomorrow. I can't lose you completely. I can't bear that."

"You're not losing me, Liz. I'm leaving a big part here, with you. I'm leaving my heart with you. And I'll come back. Every chance I get, I'll come back here. For you. Only for you," Sam whispered to her, holding her tightly.

The sadness enveloped them both like a heavy blanket. For a while, the strength they drew from each other balanced that heaviness, but eventually, it became too much. With aching hearts and feelings of guilt, both fell into an uneasy sleep, while the sun had already crossed the horizon.

WHO-DEY 🧡