Who would have thought they would ever be in this position again after all these years?
Forty years.
It was the first official day for the recording of their new album, Voyage, and Benny was standing in the recording room where the four of them would be in in a couple of hours. He was anxious all night last night, barely getting enough sleep. He must have annoyed his wife endlessly with his tossing and turning, but nothing helped his jitters.
It felt surreal that all four of them would be together again in a studio, making music after four decades.
When they had unofficially broken up as a band in 1982, they never really saw each other again. Sure, there were occasions where they met up for the people all four of them loved – Stig, Görel, their kids...but just the four of them? For fun? Never. It's funny to him that when they started the band, they were two young couples who innocently believed they would be together forever. Those four youngins weren't entirely wrong, Benny muses. Much like he admitted to himself in 1982, he knew that the divorces only really severed their marital ties, but in the eyes of the world? The four of them will always be together – an A and a B, a B and an A.
But damn...who would have thought he'd end up with Björn, Benny thinks amusedly. For fifty years, they'd been each other's partners in the professional world – producing music and movies that would go on living even when their time comes. Much to Benny's relief, that's where their relationship ended. Maybe that's why it worked so well. Björn and he had never really met up for coffee or anything like that. They were friends who made music together, and that was that. As for Agnetha, Björn and her naturally got together more frequently, mainly for their kids. Benny always thought that admirable, and he'd always been proud of his two friends for rising above the damage their relationship had caused them.
Pulling away from his thoughts, Benny reminds himself that there is much to do that day. He was quite happy about not getting a good night's sleep because he was the first one in the studio this morning. He had some time to spare, so he decided to play the piano before everyone else arrived.
...
Frida could hear the sound of the piano from where she was standing. She'd been in front of this door for half an hour now, just listening to the beautiful music coming from the room. Many of the staff members had passed by her, asking if there was anything she needed. They told her Benny was the first one there, and they wouldn't think about disturbing him while he was in the zone lest they irk him. Frida agreed with that logic based on experience. Anyway, it would be moot to distract Benny when he was working. That feat was practically impossible.
She was anxious to get in the room – why? She couldn't really explain. So here she was, just in front of the door, looking ahead. But the thing is, she really shouldn't be standing for a long time. Her hip would never forgive her. And so, even though she preferred to stay outside, Frida took a deep breath and moved to open the door.
...
Benny was playing the final notes of I Still Have Faith In You when he heard the door open. He didn't turn to the person at the door immediately. He wanted to see if he could identify who it was by the sound of their footsteps. But when he caught a whiff of their perfume, he knew for sure who it was, and his face broke into a smile.
Frida.
"Hey, Benny," she said softly. When Benny turned to meet her eyes, he couldn't help his excitement. He stood up and strode across the room to meet her in a bear hug. They had seen each other just a couple of weeks ago to discuss their plans for the upcoming show, but for some reason, he missed her, and it seems she did too.
"How are you?" he asked when she pulled away.
"Good. Kind of anxious about today," she replied, looking around the control room, a twinkle of awe decorating her eyes. He assisted her to the duet bench and sat right next to her.
"It's been a while, huh?" He looked at her, trying to break the ice.
"Well, kind of. I recorded some stuff here and there over the years, but this..in this studio...it's definitely different."
There was something in the air between them now, Benny realizes. It was almost as if Frida was afraid to talk to him. They had been apart for so long, maybe they forgot how to talk to each other in private? That would not do for Benny. He's done it before; he could make Frida comfortable with him again.
"What did you think of the song?" he tried.
Frida smiled brightly at him, her nose wrinkling, "I felt very strongly for it. I was happily surprised when I started crying. You outdid yourself, old man."
"Oh, you say?" He responded with a laugh, feeling the familiar flutter in his stomach whenever Frida liked his composition. They share a quiet laugh together, and Benny feels a little bit of the tension start to dissipate between them. She turned her attention to his piano and started to run her fingers through the keys, careful not to press anything. Suddenly, he was transported to a memory of years past, to the night he came home and played the backing track of Dancing Queen for her. He still vividly remembered how worried he felt when she started to cry, but the hug she gave him after cleared his mind from all anxiety. "I loved it, that's all," she spoke through tears, and he loved her then. Fiercely. Completely.
The Frida in front of me now wasn't so different, he noticed as he looked at her profoundly. Sure, she had more lines on her face, and her hair was blonde, but she was as beautiful as the night he met her. He still felt that gnawing desire to count her freckles, but evidently, he restrained himself from letting that thought go further. Both of them had people they loved, but there was no denying that the energy between them had always been forceful. No wonder we shouldn't be left alone, Benny thinks.
Benny jolted when he saw Frida waving in front of him, stopping herself from laughing, "Hey, Mister Benny, you're staring," she said, her voice cutting through his thoughts and her eyes fluttering mischievously. Worried he was caught red-handed, Benny hurried to apologize, but Frida smiled, playfully slapping his shoulder.
"Oh, Benny, calm down. We're okay." Frida laughed, taking his hand and holding on to it.
"Yeah?" Benny replied, a little unsure but captivated by her laugh.
"Of course," she said, her face turning more serious, even with her smile still intact. "And...I know what you mean," she finished.
"But I didn't say anything?" he questioned.
"Yes, but I know you. I know where your mind went just now," she paused. "And I know...because I feel it, too. I think about you all the time, you know." Frida quipped nonchalantly.
This was a revelation to Benny.
Frida had always been the more secretive between the two of them, but somehow, the years turned her around. Perhaps the losses she had survived taught her to be brave enough not to hide from her feelings anymore.
Benny really didn't know how to respond to that, but damn if he let the conversation end there, "You do?" he said, hopeful.
"Yes. We're old enough now, Benny. There's no use feeling sad about what happened in the past," she smiled.
Benny wanted to say more, hungry to know more about how she felt about him. Unfortunately, his window closed when Agnetha and Björn happily entered the room together, holding four cups of hot liquid. At the sight of them, Benny couldn't help but picture the four young people back in the 70s whose dreams were yet to come true.
Benny is grateful that the years have not changed them – not fundamentally. And this time around, the pressure is gone. There was only room for love and joy.
It's not lost on Benny that he would press Frida for more information in the next few weeks. He was really curious, but he was in no hurry. And when he saw the look on Frida's face when their eyes met, he knew she felt it too. There was a pull there...a promise that more was to come...that this isn't where it ends.
...
but, this is where the story ends <3 [also, might be the last one for a while because of work and all :')]
happy new year!!
