My Montana (Cole Walter fanfic)

{Chapter 4-The visitor}

"So Josie, how have you been?" the older woman sat across from her, pen in hand, book in lap. It takes a minute to reply, her nail polish becoming all of a sudden interesting.

"I've been good. You know, just been busy with school and all," her eyes don't meet the women, keeping her focus on picking the nail polish off.

"I'm assuming that's why it has been a few weeks since you have come for a session," the question is simple, all she had to do was say, and she was for some reason finding that hard to say. Her head moves up and down and she looks up and gives the woman a small smile before looking down again.

"Has there been something bothering you?" she shakes her head. The woman leans back in her chair and sighs.

"Josie, you have been coming to see me for years. You know that you can talk to me," Josie bites her lips and takes a deep breath.

"Is it normal to still have them? The nightmares. Because it has been 8 years and I am still waking up from them, multiple times a week. When does it stop? How do I make them stop?" her voice cracks and she bites down on her tongue to stop the tears threatening her eyes. The older woman looks at her, her eyebrows frowned together and she sighs.

"Everyone deals with trauma differently Josie. Some people never get over it, it's something that they always have to deal with and it never seems to stop. There usually isn't much they can do. But there is only one thing that i have seen that work," Josie looks up at the woman and scoffs.

"And what's that?"

"Find what makes you happy, cling onto it. Don't hold back on happiness because you are scared of losing it. Sometimes you have to embrace the fear in order to be happy."

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Josie walks out of the building, covering her head with her jacket as the rain pours down on her. Sprinting across the car park, she flings open the door and catapults herself into the seat, slamming the door behind her. Hattie chuckles as she takes in her appearance.

"Bet you werent expecting that," she jokes, causing Hattie to shake her head.

"Definitely not what I needed," she buckles herself into the seat and leans her head back and sighs.

"So how was therapy?" Hattie asks slowly, not wanting to ask too much, she treads carefully. Josie shakes her head and lets out a breath before turning to her aunt.

"Exhausting, like it always is. You know" she turns fully in her seat and leans on the armrest in the middle. "I have been going to see June for 8 years, and just as i think i have her completely worked out, she goes and says some completely unexpected shit." Hattie chuckles.

"Sweetie, she is the therapist, she is meant to be figuring you out to help you, not the other way round," Hattie turns the key in the ignition, bringing the car to the lift and driving forward. Josie turns in her seat facing forward.

"I know, but it's fun. I mean we can't just focus on me all the time. I need to put my head somewhere else for a little bit when I'm with her," Hattie gives a soft hum in acknowledgement but keeping herself focused on the road.

"Do you feel better," Hattie asks her, letting her eyes fall to Josie for a split second. Josie shrugs.

"I mean... kinda. I don't know, she just said some stuff that I'm trying to make sense of."

"And what's that?"

"She suggested that I need to let myself be happy. Maybe being happy will help suppress the nightmares. Which dont get it," she turns her head and looks outside the car at the town as it passes by.