Unforgotten memories (Gacha OC)

Comforted by the darkness

Written on 2024-01-09 by Cole Moon

To be edited further

Story took place when [OC] was 8

Darkness, a symbol of loneliness, mystery, fear, depression, death. The list goes on and on with no stop. 

The dark is usually what strikes fear in one's heart the most.

In the dark you lose your sense of sight. Something that most fear. 

But in my eyes, being left alone, abandoned, by the one who was supposed to care for you struck fear in my heart the most. 

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I was sitting down in a corner, leaning back on the wall while I lift up my head, staring at the ceiling. Tears were dripping off of my face and crashed against the floor.

I didn't have the energy or courage to scream or shout anymore. 

My mom locked me here after she scolded me for doing something wrong. 

It was my fault. 

I know.

I screamed and shouted for her to stop and apologized to her but she still dragged me down here and locked me here until "I learn my lesson".

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The room was empty, bare, except for me in it.

There was no available light source inside the basement, leaving the room pitch black. The  air was cold and dusty, the ground was bare and had only screws, wooden planks, dust, bugs, and tears. 

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The silence made my ears ring loudly as I could hear nothing, other than my pathetic crying.

The replay of what happened aches my chest, I still wasn't used to this happening even though this has happened several times.

Mother was always hyperreactive and harsh.

She loved my younger sister and I dearly but sometimes acted out.

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Whenever she locked me down here, it wasn't the dark I feared the most but rather I took it as her abandoning me.

Leaving me in this wreck of a room with nothing more but just me. 

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I eventually stopped crying but I still sniffled here and there.

I wiped my nose with my shirt and wiped the remaining tears off of my face.

As I stared at the ceiling I realized that it was clear that I probably won't be let out soon.

Crying does nothing.

Nor does screaming.

All I can do is sit down and drown myself in my thoughts.

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I accepted the fact I was stuck here until mother lets me out.

I stared into the nothingness. 

No one was there. 

No one was going to help me.

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As I stared at the ceiling and back to the room, my body gradually stopped being so tense.

I guess my body figured it was useless being alert, there was nothing here anyway.

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As I stopped crying and sniffling, oddly enough, I found the silence.. calming?

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Not having to hear screams and shouts by your mom or your aunt. 

They were always fighting or scolding me and my little sister.

Upstairs, normally it would be loud, terrifyingly loud, but down here, it was dead silent. 

The silence was calming, not having to hear someone always shouting at you for messing up or doing something wrong.

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As I closed my eyes, I took deep breathes from the dusty air.

The darkness was soothing.

It stops being scary once you realize what the darkness has to offer for you.

Although I am alone here, 

no one was here to watch me, 

to scold me, 

to annoy me, 

to hurt me.

No one. 

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As my eyes remained shut and I breathed in and out, I drifted off to sleep from the solace that was offered to me here that I would only be able to experience at night.

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Although this happened to me years ago, 10 to be exact, I still remember the days where I felt like my mother was going to abandon me, a fear that stuck with my all through my teenage years. Even if things got better, I don't know when I'll recover from all those incidents.

I couldn't remember why I got in trouble, but I guess it was enough for my mom to drag me down to the basement.

I never knew why I had abandonment issues as I always forgot about these types of incidents after it is over, but I guess this explains it.

That was the day I found comfort in the darkness rather than fearing what I couldn't do.