A week of belonging (JeongCheol)

Tuesday

There was a bit of a chill in the air while Jeonghan walked to school. He had put on an extra sweater under his jacket so he really only felt the cold on his wrists and his face, but his nose was especially numb. He side stepped some puddles that had accumulated the night before during the rain storm. Clouds still loomed above and the air felt heavy, as though it might rain again.

Jeonghan kept looking at Seungcheols message as he walked, a warm sensation filling his chest. Seungcheol had gotten home last night, thought of Jeonghan and sent him this. He knew it was just because that is what you are supposed to do when you are in a relationship, but still. It felt immensely strange to be on someone elses mind when he wasnt present.

Jeonghan thought he should feel a bit different since for all intents and purposes he was now in a relationship. But he didnt. He felt just like the same old Jeonghan, awkward and strange.

And maybe it was because he knew this whole thing was just really going through the motions for both of them. It was like acting, just playing a role for a week. Jeonghan enjoyed theater. He had not joined the drama club for fear of making a fool out of himself, but still, he liked to put himself into new characters, step outside of himself, put on a show.

This would just be a new challenge: boyfriend.

When he settled into his seat just minutes before class started, Seungcheol immediately turned around. Why didnt you respond to my message?

Jeonghan froze. Thats right. He hadnt said anything back. He was so caught up in getting it, he had spent a lot of time considering how he should respond and then he just...didnt.

Im sorry! I panicked. Jeonghan pressed his hands to his face, completely ashamed of his lack of manners. I didnt know how to respond. He moved his hands to cover his face completely, feeling how hot his cheeks had become. It was too kind.

Seungcheol laughed. Jeonghan moved his fingers to look at him through the gaps between them. He didnt know if he had ever heard Seungcheol laugh before. Are you making fun of me?

Oh no, Seungcheol said, a smile still playing on his lips. Youre so honest. Its nice.

This just made Jeonghans face even hotter. He dropped his head to his desk and covered himself. So much for acting. Why was Seungcheol making him feel so embarrassed?

You should at least respond to messages when you are in a relationship with someone.

Jeonghan leaned in, his voice low. Can you not say that too loudly?

You dont want anyone to know we are dating even though you confessed to me? With the words he said, he could easily sound hurt, but the tone of Seungcheols voice was almost gentle. It was as if he had no personal reaction at all to this entire situation.

In a week you will move on and I just dont want to make it a thing with people, Jeonghan said, looking sideways at Jisoo, hoping he wasnt overhearing this entire conversation. The more people who were aware of it, the more impossible the situation would become. Jeonghan was performing a complicated juggling act and if the wrong person got involved, all the balls would drop to the floor.

Seungcheol furrowed his brow a bit. Even in the last few days, Jeonghan had learned he did this when he took something into serious consideration. Seungcheol nodded and said, Fine, if thats what you want. He started to turn back to the front of the room, but turned back to Jeonghan again. Does that mean you dont want to have lunch together?

Lunch? You and me? Jeonghan asked.

Yes, Seungcheol said. Thats usually what I do when I date people.

Oh, right. Jeonghan couldnt not do the things that Seungcheol expected, otherwise he might suspect that Jeonghans feelings werent real. And then he would feel completely humiliated, end up dating someone else who he falls in love with, and Jisoo would never get his chance to be with his true love. In short, disaster.