A week of belonging (JeongCheol)

Saturday

Two nights with very little sleep and still Seungcheol was up and dressed much earlier than necessary. He sat by the table in his room looking over the poster Jeonghan had given him rolled out upon it.

Seungcheol had made a mistake. Miscalculated, it seemed. He tried to ask. He thought they were on the same page and then just like that, Jeonghan was gone. He picked up his phone numerous times in the last twelve hours trying to determine something, anything to send. But, nothing sounded right.

He let his finger drop on the sign Jeonghan had made, tracing the strokes. Try your best, Seungcheol!

But Seungcheol couldnt figure out why Jeonghan would act the way he did if he liked him. Jeonghan was the one who confessed. Or, well, he had given Seungcheol the eraser and that had said he liked him.

It hit Seungcheol like a speeding train. The handwriting on the poster. It wasnt the same on the eraser. At least not the handwriting that Seungcheol knew was Jeonghans. No, if Seungcheol would have to guess, he would say the othim handwriting on this poster, that of Jisoo, was much closer to what had been on the eraser.

Now that Seungcheol was thinking of it, Jeonghan hadnt once said he liked Seungcheol since this whole thing started. The realization made Seungcheols stomach drop. Had Seungcheol misunderstood this whole thing? Had Jeonghan just gone along with it all because he figured it was just for a week? He kept mentioning it would be over by Sunday. It was something that had made Seungcheol feel ill at ease, but perhaps it was Jeonghan making it clear he was just in it for that period of time.

Had this entire week been one drawn out act? But to what end?

Seungcheol needed to stop. He shouldnt go down this road without giving Jeonghan the opportunity to explain. He didnt like to make assumptions. He didnt want to get this wrong. He also didnt want to believe any of this was true.

Jeonghan was a complete and utter disaster. He had dug himself into such a gigantic hole, no amount of help could pull him back out.

He had no idea what Seungcheol was doing last night. Perhaps he felt grateful for Jeonghan trying to support him. Or maybe he was so much a person of his word, he would go to such lengths just to be able to say he did all he could to genuinely try to be in a relationship togethim.

But Jeonghan couldnt say the same. He had been hiding so much. And still, he was the one who had fallen hard.

Jisoo had agreed to meet Jeonghan early before the school clean up day. Most of the students would be outside the school building and in the surrounding neighborhood, making sure the entire place was free of litter, and the plants and public areas were cleaned up and beautiful.

When Jeonghan found Jisoo, he was gliding back and forth on the swing of the neighborhood park, one of the many locations they would be conducting the clean up day. The air was heavy with humidity, a morning fog still clinging to the landscape.

Jeonghan winced as he looked up at the top of the structure, completely mortified that he had brought Seungcheol thime and had put him in the situation whime he would feel he had to do such a thing. His hand still tingled when he thought about it. Jeonghan had never expected to get to feel someone that close to him, in that way, and it had all happened out of false pretenses. He was ashamed of it, and still, he couldnt help but wish it could happen again.

Jeonghan! Jisoo called, jumping off the swing and joining him. What did you want to talk about?

It was too much having him stand there, looking directly at Jeonghan, his eyes so wide and trusting. He couldnt take it. He needed to be able to tell him everything, but he couldnt if he was going to be looking at him head on like that. How about we walk to the check in while we talk? he suggested.