Randoms

Swaying, spiraling, shifting into the night.

 It is both monotone and florescent, dark and light, wet and dry. I cannot seem to move my arms or legs, nor open my eyes. My chest hurts.

 What I cannot fathom is what I see.

 Many say that the light comes for you, some say the reaper himself clothed in black. Me, I see sights. I see red.

 I see my 8th birthday party, blowing out the candles cheerfully on the butterfly cake.

 I see the summer before my 15th birthday, decked out in bikinis, surrounded in friends.

 I see alcohol poisoning at 16, I see spa days at 17.

 And finally, I see myself at 18, actually, only a matter of weeks ago, posing in a simple white cardigan with my beautiful parents. We smile and fumble around with the camera, until we can take a decent picture of our flushed, tanned faces in our Puerto Rico hotel room.

 I see happiness, I see love, I see pain.

 But of all, I see red.

 A deep burgundy, slowly cloaking over each scene with each passing second, until our grins are a sickening bloody red. I writhe in pain.

 No, I do not want to see this from what seems another perspective. I want to live these moments out one by one in person. I want to live, I want to live, I want to live.

 A single bloody tear runs out of my eye. It seems to break the melancholy spell, and slowly my eyes flutter open.

 Sky, sky, sky. I see blue skies, I see leaves dancing in the cool breeze. I see clouds waving ‘hello’ to me from up above, and the sun smiling down as well.

 “join us,”  They whisper slowly. “Dance into the sky, and have some fun. Bianca, Bianca, come play.”  The wind echoes the pleads, and soon I feel myself rising from the ground.

 I reach up to the sky with open palms, and feel all of the dead weight suddenly fade out of my arms and legs. I feel free. I feel like a leaf blowing in the wind, enjoying the day.

 And then along with the weight, go my worries. Then I am filled with peace, with serenity. I float higher and higher, until all I can hear are sirens.

 Sirens, running through the land, warning those who come too close that what they have today, they will not tomorrow. Sirens, sirens, sirens. They are my friends.

 “Goodbye, sirens.” I smile slowly and wave goodbye as I go higher into the sky.

 And then I am sleepy… So I shut my eyes one last time.

 I black out.

 I die.