Call Me Romantic (BxB) [BEING REWRITEN]

Chapter 19

{ꔫ NASH ꔫ }

Pure content. That's how Nash feels: not worried about anything—grades, art, gender, being accepted—nothing will be able to pull him away from this moment. How could anything be possible? A cute, tall guy whom he loved for years—yet he won't admit it still—is hugging him and laying his head in the crook of Nash's neck. That's all the reassurance in this world that he needs. Sam is still sound asleep, lying in Nash's bed, while Nash is half awake, eyes closed but aware of Sam pressing against him. 
 
They didn't do anything last night that involved anything more than making out. Unfortunately, Nash isn't ready for anything like that yet. Being trans and having anything like sex is a difficult thing to deal with. Honestly, he would rather learn to love those parts of himself before anyone else can. Sam agreed. So they ended up just cuddling and talking for hours until they fell asleep at 4 a.m. It was sweet, and it made him smile a bit, remembering their conversations about school life, each other, and good memories. Listening to each other fall asleep was the best part, though. Nash feels cheesy as hell, but he feels like he won the lottery. 
 
The morning light shines through Nash's curtains, hitting Sam's face just right. Seriously, how is this guy not a model? He has nice, lush lips with lovely curls and beautiful, deep brown eyes that are closed shut, though if they weren't, they'd have a gold tint to them. He looks even better when he smiles and his dimples show, making him just look more alive and free. Nash can smell Sam’s scent of vanilla and strawberries; he wonders if Sam puts on perfume instead of cologne. Either way, he smells like heaven, like he wants to bundle up in it and lay there, forever comfortable. 
 
Okay, Nash has to admit that Sam has him completely wrapped around his finger. Nash is noticing things about Sam that friends or buddies don't. Not only beauty, or the cologne he wore that day, but his personality too. As Nash observed last night, Sam can be protective about himself, and insecurities run in his nightmares. He's a great kisser too; it seems he either dated a lot of people or kissed lots of people. He's popular but doesn't wish to be because of all the pressure it instills within him, always doing so much just for it and completely draining himself for people's satisfaction. His family has problems with his dad, and he is moving out in two months, in January after the divorce. He still loves his dad, shocking, but it is his dad after all. 
 
That childhood crush is being revived too easily. To be fair, Nash only stopped romanticizing him for mental health reasons and because he had a girlfriend. The jealousy was way too much to bear. Even though he focused on his transition and art, whenever he saw them in the hallway, he always wanted to bash his head in. 
 
I had a girlfriend. Not anymore. Which means... 
 
Hell, what if Sam finds out he's not gay? Or does Penny ask him out again? What if he didn't feel the same bliss that Nash felt last night? That thought brings shivers to Nash's limbs. But it's true; Nash was just helping Sam understand his sexuality. That doesn't mean Sam has the hots for him, and it doesn't mean they are dating. Ugh, why does this have to be so hard? Nash's arms tighten around Sam's back. It doesn't matter. Right now, right here, he's with Nash. He makes himself forget the future and enjoy this moment. 
 
Nash can hear his doorbell, and they both jolt awake. Sam sits up from Nash's neck, making him look like he's on top of Nash, which may be a much worse pose than if he just stayed. Not only that, but he's also shirtless, showing off his beautiful abs. Nash squeezes his eyes tight to get the image of Sam's abs out of his head and to pray—just pray it's Val and not his parents.
 
Sienna and Ember are stepping into Nash's room, their mouths made into an o. Ember looks more furious, while Sienna looks more speechless and shocked. 
 
"Oh," Sienna mouths as Sam clenches the blanket to his chest, embarrassment spreading across his face. "Hi, Mrs. Sienna.' Sam replies nervously and quietly before smiling, showing the dimples on his tan skin. 
 
Her face stays the same, while Embers just gets more deformed from her anger, as her face can melt off of her stem. Sienna's brain is a loading screen, trying to understand why her neighbor's son is over at her house, lying with her son, shirtless like she doesn't want to admit what she's seeing. Nash never had a boyfriend, so seeing this is surreal. Another second of silence goes by before Sam moves his legs away from Nash, unstraddling him and stepping on the carpet. "I should go," he lets out with a sigh, grabbing his shirt and putting it on. 
 
Nash finally sits up, feeling a pit in his stomach when Sam leaves him, knowing this is over. "Ah, okay." 
 
If death threats can be sent through eye contact, Ember would be sending them to Sam right now. Sam squeezes out of Nash's room between Ember and Sienna and quickly walks down the hall to the stairs. 
 
"I'll go check on the pie." Sienna excused herself, following Sam shortly after. Leaving Nash here with his overly angry and protective mother. 
 
Nash lifts his eyes to his mom to defend himself: "It's not what it looks like. I know it looked like we did something, but"
 
Ember shakes her head, making her messy black curls go over her shoulders from just waking up. "No. You cannot make excuses for yourself. I know exactly what this is and what it looks like."
 
"Oh god, Mom, please, we didn't do anything. We only kissed.”
 
"The hickey on your neck tells me differently." Ember points to his neck before folding her arms over her chest. "Nash, Sam punched you not even a month ago, and his friends bullied you. His family aren't good people. Now you sleep with the guy? Do you think I was never a teenager and never fooled around? You're grounded; no phone for a week."
 
Nash rubs his eyes before standing. "Mom, we didn't do anything!"
 
"The point still stands. Maybe if it was some other guy but Sam? What did I tell you about him being in this house? You're unbelievable, and I know you're better than this." She rolls her eyes and walks out of his room, slamming the door behind her. Well, great. Now he has two angry or confused moms and an awkward situation.
 
 
      ———————————————
 
 
On Monday, Nash was still grounded. He had his phone taken away, with Sam's number being deleted from it at Ember’s demand. Nash thought it was unfair and is still mad at her for that. He knows Sam has done some questionable things, but maybe a second chance is all he needs right now. Someone who can give him that trust and hope—that's what he needs. Nash knows it. 
 
He's stepping down the school hallway with his friend from art class, Archie. They are talking about some drama they heard about Penny and Val. 
 
Val threw down her hands, and Penny got beat madly. Rightfully so, you shouldn't hook up with someone who has a partner. Unless you want a mad ex chasing after you, All Nash knows is that hair got pulled, tangled and ripped out. Penny had to cut off half her long hair to her shoulders and probably have headaches for weeks with that part of her hair being ripped. 
 
Ember and Sienna have no idea about it, but Val did get into trouble and got detention. Val lied and said she was going to a club, and then forged Ember's signatures onto the papers. Nash didn't say a word about it to them because he wasn't raised as a snitch, though the whole school might snitch on her if they keep up this little rumor. 
 
"Isn't that your little boyfriend?" Archie interrupts, nudging Nash's arm. When Nash looks around, he sees Sam by the locker with his bookbag on the floor. He has a knee up, balancing some school books that he's pulling away; the ones he needs, he's dropping by his bookbag. 
 
"Sam isn't my boyfriend," Nash answers. 
 
"Friends don't give each other Hickey's. Anyway, you should go talk to him." Archie presses against the hickey that is lying on the crook of his neck, making Nash flinch and wince. “ow! Okay, okay, jeez. I'll think of something to say.” Nash groans, covering his hickey with his hand, and hears Archie laugh. 
 
Mom's walking into boys sleeping together isn't a great situation to come back from. Plus, what if Nash is right? Maybe Sam isn't into guys and is trying to move past it. Or worse, he's not into trans guys. That only hurts more, but he'd respect it and back off. He just hopes they can stay friends, still talk, and enjoy each other's company, even if it's a bit awkward.
 
Archie smirks and nudges him. “As you do that... I have some other business to attend to.” He turns around and strolls off to Nova, who just walked past, waving and smiling at the both of them. 
 
Fuck it, if Archie can be romantic, so can Nash, right?
 
Nash goes up to Sam, not caring who sees him or who's around, though he's alone. People still pass by waving to Sam, and he seems to be fine since he smiles at them. Nash taps his shoulder standing next to him, head held high, as Sam faces his locker still. "Hey, Sam."
 
Sam glances over at him before looking away. Okay, weird, nash thought.
 
"So um. I got grounded. Isn't that fun?" Nash adds as Sam stays silent like he doesn't even exist. Maybe he's not in a good mood after all. All of a sudden, Sam grabs his books faster. Is he trying to avoid me? Nash thinks his mind is running wild now. 
 
"Um, my mom deleted your number, so you'll probably have to—" he gets cut off by Sam shutting his locker, roaming away without a word. 
 
Nash's mouth gapes open as Sam travels down the hall, getting greeted by some guys—waving back—before getting swallowed by the crowd of teen kids.
 
      ———————————————