Kisses at Midnight

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Hello name is Yeji, and today is my first day of my senior year of high school. I'm both excited and nervous, even though I know what to expect.

I prepared carefully, choosing a simple but elegant outfit, and styling my hair into two pigtails. I take my backpack and leave my house, greeting my mother as I go.

She wishes me good luck and tells me to come home early. I smile at him and head towards the bus stop. The weather is nice, and I feel the fresh air on my face.

I breathe deeply, trying to calm my heartbeat.

I arrive at the bus stop and see that there are already a few students waiting. I recognize them, they are old classes. I greet them politely, but I don't linger. I've never been very close to them, and I don't want to talk. I prefer to listen to music in my headphones, and immerse myself in my thoughts.

I think about what my new year will be like. What subjects will I choose? What clubs will I join? And above all, will I make friends? I never had many friends, because I am rather shy and reserved. I don't like to mingle with others, and I prefer to stay in my own corner. I don't have confidence in myself, and I think I'm ordinary.

But deep down, I want to change. I want to open up to others, have fun, have adventures. I want to meet someone who understands me, who makes me laugh, who makes me vibrate. Someone like...Ryujin.

Ryujin is the girl I've been secretly in love with since the 12th grade. She's the most popular girl; the one that turns all heads. She is beautiful, intelligent, funny, talented. She is everything I am not.

She is the sun, and I am the shadow. I always admired her from afar, without ever daring to speak to her.

She doesn't even know I exist. She has so many friends, so many fans, so many suitors (especially pretenders).

She doesn't need me. She doesn't need anyone. But I need her. I need his smile, his look, his voice. I needto see it, to hear it, to feel it. I need her like the air I breathe. I know it's an impossible love, a one-sided love, a hopeless love.

But I can't help it. I can't control my feelings. I can't stop loving him.

The bus arrives, and I get on it. I sit down in a free seat, and I look out the window while continuing to think about this day which promises to be full of uncertainties and possibilities. The ride to school is short, but every minute seems endless. My heart is pounding, and I suppress my anxieties by immersing myself in the music blaring through my headphones.

As I arrive at high school, I feel both nostalgia for the years gone by and excitement for the times to come. The familiar corridors resonate with the echoes of the joyful conversations of students meeting up with their friends after summer vacation. Classrooms radiate new energy, ready to be filled with knowledge and challenges.

I head to my first class, aware that it's the start of my senior year in high school. The teachers greet the students enthusiastically, and I try to appear as confident as possible, although anxiety continues to gnaw at me.

As I enter the classroom, I spot a free seat and sit down discreetly. My gaze wanders across the room, and that's when I see her. Ryujin, sitting at the front of the class, surrounded by her friends. My heart races, and I feel overwhelmed by a mixture of admiration and nervousness.

I suddenly remember that Ryujin is a year younger than me, but she skipped a grade in her elementary school. This is how we find ourselves in the same class today. This thought adds a particular nuance to my perception of this first day.

The day passes between classes, new meetings and decisions to be made. I try to be more open, to participate more in class, but the specter of Ryujin still hovers in my thoughts. I wonder how to break the invisible barrier that separates us.