Chapter 60

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"Mom." Jason sighed inwardly as the word escaped him. He hadn't wanted her to find out this way. She deserved a better reconciliation than one that took place in a busy hospital in front of an elevator.

"Jason?" Monica asked, quietly. Her eyes were filled with hope and love as she tentatively placed a hand on his arm. When he didn't flinch from her touch, tears sprang to her eyes and she asked again, "Jason?"

"Yes...Mom. It's me," Jason said with a sad smile. When her arms encircled him in a warm embrace, he didn't pull away from her. He returned the hug like he had all the other hugs he had given her before he became a new person...with love.

"How...? When...?" Monica asked, tearfully.

Jason felt the inquiring eyes as they stared at him and Monica. Not wishing to be a public spectacle, he ended their hug and said, "Maybe we should go somewhere else and talk about this."

"Okay," Monica said as she reluctantly pulled away. "Where would you like to go? My office? Somewhere else?"

"Let's go to 23. There's an enclosed garden there, right? Do you think it would be crowded this time of day?" Jason asked.

"No, it should be fine. Besides, my status as acting Chief of Staff usually shoos people away on sight," she said with a small laugh.

They made their way to the garden in silence, each consumed with their thoughts. Jason wondered what words he should use to tell her that he'd 'been back' for several weeks. He didn't want to hurt her any more than he already had. Monica, on the other hand, had a full heart as she thought of the return of her baby boy. All the other doctors had said it would never happen. The Jason, she knew and loved, would never come back and that he was gone forever, but they were wrong. Just as she always knew they would be.

As they opened the glass doors which separated them from the enclosed garden, they found that Monica had been correct. The place was deserted. They could have their moment together in private.

The glass doors closed with a swooshing sound and Monica immediately pounced on him with questions. Jason smiled as she voiced her questions and concerns as rapidly as they came to her.

"How did this happen? When did it happen? Are you okay? Have you been examined by a doctor? What did the doctor say? Is this permanent?"

"One at time, Mom. One at a time," Jason said as he took her hand and led her to one of the several stone benches which complimented the garden.

"What happened? And, when?" she asked. She laughed when she realized that she had two questions for him instead of one.

"Make that two at time," he laughed with her. He sobered as her hand squeezed his. The gentle pressure reminded him of just how much he missed her. How much he missed having the comfort of his mother's unconditional love in his life. He returned her squeeze as he began to speak.

"Remember when I went to Paris to visit Robin? Around the time Nikolas took a bullet that was meant for me?" When Monica slowly nodded, he continued. "Some things happened and out of the blue I began to speak French. Perfectly and from out of nowhere. It was the same as how I immediately knew what to do for Nikolas. The words, the same as the procedure, just came back to me. I didn't fight it and I allowed it to take over. Anyway, later that night, I had an awful headache. From my line of reasoning, the trip to Paris triggered something deep inside of me. Something, my brain refused to ignore..."

"You went to Paris with Keesha," Monica said quietly.

"Yes, I did. The time we spent there together was magic," he said in a faraway voice. The memories of being in love with her, and better still, her in love with him caused him to lose himself in his thoughts and strongest dreams. The weight of Monica's eyes on him broke him from his reverie and he began to speak again.

"Well, with the headaches came the memories. At first, they were all jumbled, and I couldn't make heads or tails of any of them, but over time, they began to make sense. The more vicious the headache, the stronger the memory. I remembered birthdays, anniversaries, things which didn't really make sense or a difference to Jason Morgan."

Jason paused as he sought the words to continued. Monica saw the strain in his tortured blue eyes and again she squeezed his hand to offer him comfort. "Take your time," she said.

The soothing tone of her voice and the gentle pressure gave him the strength he needed to continue. After a deep a breath, he said, "It didn't all come together until Justus came to me with news about Keesha. At first Morgan fought the memory of her, but as the thought of her being tortured by those animals refused to disappear from my mind, the more the memories demanded to be acknowledged. By the time of the rescue mission, I had remembered everything and the only thought in my mind was bringing her back safe and sound."

"AJ said you were adamant about his not being involved..." Monica said slowly.

"I was. I didn't want him there," he said fiercely.

"Because of Keesha?" she asked softly, instinctively knowing what his answer would be.

"Yes. Because of Keesha. I want her back, Mom. I make no apologies for how I treated AJ. I can't apologize because it wouldn't be true. I still love her, and I know that deep down inside...she still loves me, too."

~*~

"Are you sure you don't mind?" Keesha asked as she and AJ sat in a secluded table in the hospital's cafeteria.

"I'm fine as long as you are," AJ said with a smile. He was relieved to see that she wasn't as visibly upset as she had been when he first found her. He knew that it was a facade and that she had internalized some of her emotions. Later, when she was ready, she would bring them out to the surface again and face them. She was strong when it came to facing her demons and he admired her for it.

"I'm okay. The food isn't as bad as everyone thinks. I think when Stefan Cassadine took over, he demanded that the cooks be replaced with world class chefs," she said with a small laugh.

"So, this Fettuccine Alfredo won't kill me?" he asked as he raised an eyebrow in disbelief.

"You may not forget you had it, but no, it definitely won't kill you," Keesha replied, digging into her vegetarian lasagna.

AJ laughed again as he dramatically rubbed his stomach. Taking a chance, he began to eat. He smiled as he found the creamy sauce was pleasing to his palate. Oh, what the hell, he thought. The food was good especially considering it was made in GH's cafeteria.

"AJ?"

"Yeah," AJ said in response to Keesha's soft voice.

"How much of our argument did you hear?" she asked, as she lowered her fork to her plate. She leaned her back against the metal chair as she waited for AJ's response.

AJ took a deep breath and lowered his fork to his plate, too. His eyes held hers as he answered her. "I heard quite a bit. Your voices were already raised when I came around the corner. I recognized yours and started to intervene, but when I saw that it was Jason, I decided to wait it out. I'm sorry, Keesha. I should have stopped it before it got so bad."

Keesha reached across the table and covered AJ's hand with her own as she said, "You did the right thing. If you had said anything, I think it would have made matters worse. I'm just glad you stuck around."

AJ turned his hand over and palm to palm, he squeezed her hand. "I'll always be there whenever you need me. I want you to know that."

"I do know that. If I don't know anything else, I know that," she said. She saw the longing and hope in his eyes. She wished she could give him more. She wished she could tell him that he was the only man for her and that she loved only him, but she couldn't. Even as mad as she was with Jason, she knew deep within her heart of hearts she was no more closer to an answer than she had been. She couldn't tell AJ anything concrete until she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that all traces of the love she felt for Jason had completely left her heart. She just wished she knew when that would be, or better still, if it would ever happen.

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