From the way he compressed the sexy lips that I was admiring a while ago, I know I should regret the brave words that came from my impulsiveness.
"That's none of your business, Jessie," nakakunot ang noong sabi nito.
I tried not to back out from his retort. He was still standing arrogantly leaning at the sink. His eyes glittered darkly. I kept my cool and shrugged my shoulder. Kunwa'y balewalang ibinaba ko sa countertop ang iniinom ko na gatas.
"When I came back last year, ilang beses ng naurong ang engagement party ninyo. And then you quarrelles like that. Hindi kaya dapat ninyong pag-isipan kung magpapakasal kayo?" I looked at him bravely but my knees became even weaker.
Jessie, isa kang Gabriella Silang, tila pagkastigo ko sa sarili.
Kailan pa ako nagkaroon ng ganitong tapang pagdating kay Rigs? It was nothing more than a shared cold 'hi' and 'hello' from him and the polite three to four-word answers to my query, I tried to prolong our conversation but he was very evasive. Hindi lamang pakiramdam ko, pero alam ko na umiiwas siya sa akin.
Sa lahat ng nakilala kong lalaki ay si Rigs lamang ang nagpakita ng ganitong klaseng kalamigan na hindi ko alam kung bakit. Maliban sa pagpapakita ko ng interes sa kanya, kung masyado na bang forward ang pagpapansin ko sa kanya noon nasa high school kami. Madalas na magdala ako ng mango float na siyang naging expertise ko at gustong-gusto iyon ni Rian, at sinasabi ko iyon kay Rigs na para sa kanya ang nasa fridge na pilit kong sinasabihan si Rian na tigilan na ang pagkain noon. Pero maliban sa maikling salamat ay sinabihan niya ako na tigilan na ang pagbibigay ng kung ano-ano sa kanya. Napahiya ako roon pero hindi ako tumigil sa pagpapakita ng interes na gusto ko siyang maging kaibigan hanggang magpakita sa akin ng interes ang kaibigan nito na si Anthony. Habang hinahabol ko si Rigs ay may Anthony na nagpapakita na gusto ako. Marahil sa inis ko at pagkapahiya na inaayawan ako ni Rigs ay sinagot ko ito agad. But Anthony was popular with girls. Hindi pa kami nagtatagal ay nalaman ko na may iba pa siyang nililigawan. I broke up with him despite his refusal.
Adding to my bruised heart and maybe my pride that my first try to have a boyfriend failed, Rigs started to like someone.
Si Rigs na imbes na ako ang magustuhan ay ang popular sa mga beauty contest sa San Cristobal ang niligawan nito. Hindi ako makapaniwala noon nang ibalita sa akin ni Rian iyon. At nakita ko nga na totoo ngang girlfriend na niya ang babae nang maaksidente si Rian sa paglalaro at ako mismo ang nagdala sa kanya sa hospital. Humahangos na dumating noon si Rigs kasama si Gina.
Maybe it was then that I realized that I meant nothing to him so I stopped showing my affection. After two years of attending my class in La Salle, my parents announced that we were migrating to Australia. Within those years, I was updated to what was happening to him thru his sister. Ilang beses na rin naman na nakilala ni Rian ang nagiging boyfriend ko sa Australia. At ilang beses na rin niya akong kinakantyawan na hindi maka move on sa kuya nito.
Maybe she was right. At the back of my mind, I was too obsessed with the idea of wanting Rigs to be my boyfriend. My thought stopped remembering our past when I heard he hissed my name.
I saw how his jaw hardened. "And how about you, Jessie? Kontento ka na lamang ba sa palipat-lipat ng boyfriend? O hanggang ngayon hinihintay mo na hiwalayan ni Tony ang asawa niya?" sarkastikong tanong nito. There was a challenge in the dark obs looking at me ominously.
Napamaang ako rito at ramdam ko ang pamumula ng mukha ko sa direktang pang-iinsulto niya. Paano napasok si Anthony sa usapan? I haven't heard from him mula nang pumunta ito sa wake ng Lolo last year. Bagamat sa San Cristobal nakatayo ang malaking bahay na ipinagawa ni Anthony nang ikasal ito, ang sabi ni Rian ay mas madalas na nasa Manila rin ang mag-asawa dahil sa kumpanya ng naging asawa ni Anthony. Nakita niya ng isang beses ang asawa nito na si Claudette Miranda Tien, isang socialite na anak ng isang Chinese business man na may-ari ng bakeshop at nakakalat sa buong bansa ang mga branches nito. Higit na naging guwapo si Anthony na may isa na rin anak. Maliban sa tuwang-tuwa ito na makita ko at nagpakita ng simpatya sa pagkamatay ni Lolo ay wala na akong naramdaman pa na kakaibang ipinapakita ni Anthony. Tahimik noon ang asawa nito na pormal lamang ang naging pagbati. Sabi ni Rian ay madalas daw magbantay ang asawa nito mula nang mahuli na may babae si Anthony sa San Cristobal. Hindi pa rin pala nagbabago si Anthony.
"Anong kinalaman ni Anthony sa usapan?" Hindi ko na maiwasan na kumunot din ang noo. Nawala na ang pagka-asiwa na nararamdaman kanina dahil sa akusasyon nito.
He smirked. He shrugged his shoulder. "You tell me. Balita sa San Cristobal na may babae na naman si Tony. And it was timely at this point that you were also there." There was malice in his voice and the look from his eyes was something that made me feel embarrassed.
As if he was looking at those women who worked two towns away from San Cristobal who sell themselves to foreigners. Rigs was a very conservative man.
My cheeks flamed even more. "And you thought that I was seeing Anthony? He is married!" Hindi ko na napigilang magtaas ng boses.
Tila hindi naapektuhan si Rigs nang pagtaas ko ng boses. Pero nagtaas baba na ang dibdib ko sa nararamdaman na pagka-insulto. Kailan pa ako nagkaroon ng imahe na mang-aagaw ng asawa? Never in my fucking twenty-eight years of existence that I romantically or intimately involved with a married guy!
"Would it stop you if you like the person so much?" There was a challenge in his voice as he didn't remove his gaze from me. Trying to read me. Trying to know the truth from me.
Napakurap ako. I stood there, immobilized by how we were exchanging this heated conversation, firing biting words at each other. Kailan kami nagkaroon ng ganitong usapan? I swallowed hard as I felt the same attraction, the same want to have him intimately. And Rian's words echoed from my head.
Screaming in my ears that her brother...
This man who stood in front of me, no affection or whatsoever in the way he looked at me— liked me once. But why he didn't say so? Why he avoided me like I was contaminated with some disease?
"No." I looked at him bravely. Nakita ko ang pagtiim ng labi niya. "But we all know that it wasn't Tony that I liked so much."
Ako na matapang. Oo, ako na.
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BINABASA MO ANG
A Mistaken Love Affair (2018)
RomanceJessie is very much attracted to her best friend's brother, Rigs. But why not? He is good looking, hot, an architect and with a big house near the city. And he is also engaged to his childhood sweetheart. She was brokenhearted without a boyfriend. ...
