𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫'𝐬 𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲 [𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄]

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ╳ 𝐛𝐮𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐧

"What?" I ask, but my own voice sounds distant as if it isn't coming from me.

I can tell Dr. Perez is trying to explain, but I can barely hear him either. I just watch as he pulls x-rays from the folder and points at some part of my body that just looks like splotches of grey and white to me.

  I stand abruptly.

"No, that's not-" I pause, pinching the bridge of my nose.

  "I haven't had any symptoms."

"That's always a possibility. Have you noticed any changes in your cycle at all?"

  "Well, maybe. But, I've always been irregular, so I wouldn't have thought much of it. And I've been busy with work and-" I sit back down with a huff.

  "Mrs. Ricci, I understand if you need a moment to process thi-"

  "No." I sigh. "H-how far along?"

  "We can't be certain until we conduct a proper ultrasound, but if I had to guess," Dr. Perez peered at the X-Ray. "About seven weeks."

   I sit in silence.

We hadn't been trying, but we hadn't been not trying either.

  "Can you keep this private for now?" I say after a long moment of quiet. "I don't want Angelo to worry about me, especially when he should be healing."

  "Absolutely, Mrs. Ricci." Doctor Perez smiles gently. "When you're comfortable, you can e-mail me and I'll send these scans to your obstetrician at home."

  "Thank you."

  "Of course." The doctor nods. "And outside of, well, the fetus, everything seems fine. No fractures or breaks. But, your primary physician can give you a second look and prescribe you something for any persistent pain."

"Okay, thanks." I say again with a weak smile. Finally, Dr. Perez leaves the room.

 
   "Shit." I whisper to myself.

"Shit!" I say, louder.

  Seven weeks? How did I not notice anything for seven weeks?

  I pace the room for a few minutes, trying to reconvene and collect my thoughts. My mind travels back to seven weeks ago, trying to figure out what the date of conception might have been. Seven weeks. Nearly two months.

  Angelo and I had our third anniversary two months ago. Go figure.

I stop pacing finally and take a deep, but shaky, breath. My hands shake a little and my head feels heavy.

Despite the flurry of emotions swirling in my chest I take a few more long breaths to steady myself, stepping out of the examination room.

As I make my way back to the other room, one thought permeates my mind.