as an arrow needs a pulsing heart

anticipating in a retrograde cycle

Zagreus, of course, does not defeat Lord Hades.

He does not defeat his Lord Father in the first cycle that he challenges him, nor the second, nor the fifth; he wears his exhaustion like a mantle, almost proud. Thanatos hears (but does not listen for) the inklings of awe and admiration flowing through each of the realms, a constant-murmuring stream. He hears, too, of all the happenings: the particulars of every run.

(He's damn near made friends with the blasted Minotaur—)

A long time elapses before they again encounter one another at the House. Thanatos isn't sure whether this is an orchestration, recalling the words he'd uttered when last Zagreus cornered him there; does Zagreus' absence signify that he is, for once, attempting to heed? Or is it just another act of defiance?

Go about your business, Zag. What if Lord Hades saw us chatting like this, now? I risked everything by helping you out there, and still you failed...

But after the eighth failure, Thanatos makes for Zagreus' bedchamber in spite of every drop of better judgement, for all the realms an answer to what is just another call. (For one who fields the cries of both the dead and living, Zagreus' voice in need rings the loudest of all.)

The bejeweled mirror harkens them, as always. How many times now has Thanatos lain Zagreus to rest, for it to bear witness? The glass projects their faces, fixed and cold, gleaming with a kind of hushed knowing. Neither among them offers words for anything that has transpired, though Thanatos, still scathing, strangles the urge. Zagreus sinks into his bed like a stone, telltale bottle clenched in one hand.

Thanatos pointedly ignores it, but lets his fingers touch to skin. Zagreus affords him a small, sheepish smile.

"I do appreciate you doing this, Than. I know I've not made it easy for you."

"Yes, well. Hurry and remove your things. I cannot stay here long. The Lord Master will soon return."

Zagreus' fingers are already meeting metal and bone, unclasping the three-headed bulwark that shields his heart, stripping himself of clothing, working steadily down. The winking little bottle, now settled somewhere at his side. "You didn't come to find me," he remarks; his voice sounds strained. "These last few times."

"You had no need for me." You were determined not to sleep, and so gave me no rest, and some other things besides, Thanatos does not say.

At this, Zagreus appears hurt. The abject openness of his face only ignites Thanatos further. "Must there always be a need?"

"If you must so stupidly continue this pursuit," Thanatos retorts, "you will have to rest more often, Zagreus." He stays his hand, the slender ridges of his knuckles grazing Zagreus' temple, and draws a stern, cold line with his lips.

Zagreus lets forth a weak peal of laughter, crackled and blunt and so much different than the lively gale to which Thanatos is accustomed, or was.

"I suppose you would like that, eh Than?" Zagreus' tone is an indecipherable codex; there's no cipher or key that can get to the heart of what might be embedded within it. With his armor so removed, Zagreus' eyes flutter slowly and restively shut, like a butterfly's wings. (And Thanatos is actually glad that he can't see his eyes; his face might betray nothing, but his pupils, the psyche—)

"Tell me what I am to you," he spits, unable to bear it any longer.

Zagreus' eyes fly open in an instant. He looks as if he's been stunned, or else knocked square to the cheek by a lout. "What?"

"You ignore my petitions and you spurn my advices, only to come back bloody with a bottle of nectar to beseech me to help you on your insipid quest. Then gone again, before I can blink. Now you've reached your natural limit, struck down by the hand of your father, yet I know you'll be back to the Temple before night or morning. And then, you dare—" (the ghosts of whispers but not words, and the faintest brush of fingers, Zagreus' eyes at his lips; still daring not to speak it, for to say would be to seal). "I grow tired of this chase, Zag, and this cruel game. If I am to help you to sleep again, you will give me this in return. You will tell me what we are."